The night I tried to call John Paul II

This may or may not be a fun time to share this.  But there's been a lot of good humor about the papacy in the past couple of days (I think the best joke I've heard is that Chicago's NBA team is changing its name to the Papal Bulls) so why not?

Inspired by Steve Jobs (who had tried impersonating Henry Kissinger) in the spring of 1996 I attempted to telephone Pope John Paul the Second.  I had managed to find the number to the Vatican switchboard and so I called it.  I disguised my voice to sound like that of President Bill Clinton.  I told the operator who "I" was and that I had to speak with His Holiness.

Several minutes after being put on hold a gruff-sounding man picked up the line.  He said something in a thick accent and then demanded "Who is this??"

"Sir, I am President Bill Clinton of the United States, and I need to speak with the pope."

"You do not sound like President Clinton.  You should be much ashamed young man!"

The line went dead.

I'll never know how close I was to talking with John Paul II but I like to think that I wasn't too far off 😛

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Congratulations to Leo XIV

Cardinal Robert Prevost was announced a little while ago to be the next pope, Leo XIV. 

He's the first American to become pope.  He is also likely the very first person from Chicago elected to office who will end his term without going to jail.

(Oh come on, nothing wrong with a little humor!)

Although I am not a Catholic, I will be praying that Pope Leo XIV will lead his church with wisdom, humbleness, and courage to do right in all things.

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POPE SMOKE WATCH 2013 #3: It's WHITE!

Either those cardinals are taking one heckuva break for Camels, or they have just elected the next pope!

Watching it right now.  Awesome scene at Saint Peter's Square.  Now we just gotta learn who it is that's been voted on.

Whoever it is, may God's wisdom and grace be upon him.  I'm not Catholic, but I appreciate my Catholic brethren's enthusiasm and I absolutely have to wish them and their new leader well :-)

"Habemus Papam!"

UPDATE 2:26 p.m. EST: Here's a pic of that white smoke going up!

UPDATE 2:44 p.m. EST: Lots of humor about this on Twitter right now.  Thankfully none or very little of it seems to be vulgar :-)

UPDATE 3:15 p.m. EST: Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio from Argentina is the new pope! A Jesuit from Argentina.  I think that makes him the first "New World" pope.

UPDATE 3:20 p.m. EST:  So his papal name will be "Pope Francis".  Is that the first, second etc.?

UPDATE 3:36 p.m. EST:  This will indeed be Pope Francis, first of his name.  By all accounts an incredibly humble, compassionate and quiet man.

And here he is from a few moments ago, his first appearance as pope and giving the traditional "Urbi et Orbi" blessing to the crowd...

Update 4:15 p.m. EST:  Lots of people are noting that Pope Francis' first words were to ask the people for their blessing, rather than bestow his blessing upon them.  It was a gesture of remarkable humility.

I'm also hearing that before this Conclave, Cardinal Bergoglio refused to reside in the mansion reserved for the overseer of the Church in Argentina.  Instead he chose to live in a quite modest apartment in Buenos Aires.  He rode the public bus every day.  Bergoglio even cooked dinner for himself.

A pope who does his own cooking?  Now that is pretty cool :-)

Well, this is the second Conclave that this blog has tried to cover "as it happens", and Lord willing it will be quite a long time before I have to do it again.  Congratulations to Pope Francis.  Though I be not a Catholic, my prayers absolutely go out to him as he begins the task entrusted him.

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POPE SMOKE WATCH 2013 #1: First black smoke over the Vatican

Looking at CNN right now: black smoke is pouring out of the chimney of the Sistine Chapel... and how!  There's not gonna be any confusion this time around.

So we know that the cardinals within have had their first ballot and no one has been elected pope.  Which was what most people were expecting anyway.

Two more votes tomorrow.

UPDATE 2:59 p.m. EST:  Scott Bradford notes that there will be four ballots tomorrow - 2 each in the morning and afternoon - and not two as previously reported.

As an aside, I'm seeing some good-humored jesting about this.  One friend said that based on the black smoke "Willie Nelson has just been elected pope", while someone on Twitter is reporting that the Black Smoke Monster (from Lost) is the new pope.

Come to think of it, that's the blackest black smoke I've ever seen.  We need John Locke on the scene, STAT! :-)

UPDATE 3:41 p.m. EST:  Here's a photo of the black smoke that poured out of the Sistine Chapel chimney a short while ago...

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An illustrated guide to the Papal Conclave

The chimney has been installed and tested.  The Swiss Guard are even now still sweeping the place for bugs and spies.  Saint Peter's Square is bracing for the crowds...

Tomorrow morning (Rome time) the College of Cardinals of the Roman Catholic Church will enter the Sistine Chapel at the Vatican.  Once it has been confirmed that no one else is present (apart from a very few medical personnel and other attendants who are pledged to uphold secrecy) the doors will be closed and sealed, and the cardinals within will begin deliberation and voting on who will be the next pope.

It is called Conclave (from the Latin cum clave, meaning "with a key")  And it is a ritual which has endured for more than eight hundred years.  But what does happen among the cardinals once they are within the Sistine Chapel and its doors tied off with red silk ribbon?

The Fellowship Of Catholic University Students (FOCUS) has put up on its website a very thorough and comprehensive illustrated guide to the cardinal camaraderie, contemplation and ceremony of the Conclave.  Everything from the arrival of the cardinals to the Urbi et Orbi ("to the city and to the world") blessing that the new pontiff will give.

And by the way, FOCUS has also set up PopeAlarm.com!  Yes, have the announcement of the next Holy See sent directly to your e-mail or text.  Truly, we live in an age of miracles :-) 

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