Mister Miyagi screams "BONZAI!" for the last time: Pat Morita has passed away

This just reeks. I'm literally at a loss for the words I'm looking for to convey how low my heart feels right now. Being a child of the Eighties, Mister Miyagi was one of my heroes. One minute he was this cute little handyman trying to catch houseflies with chopsticks. The next he was this engine of rage karate-chopping hoodlums into pain and agony. "Wax on, wax off!" The guy became, I think it's safe to say he became a genuine archetype of wise master, right up there with Gandalf and Obi-Wan Kenobi.

But if Mister Miyagi became all those things, so much more so was the man who portrayed him. There was a time when Pat Morita was everywhere. I think at one point he was in just about as many commercials as Bill Cosby. Heck back in the day he was even a regular on Sanford and Son and Happy Days. Whatever he did, Morita always seemed nothing less than sincere about who he was, and it always went back to being that sweet little man with the humble voice and noble eyes. Who just as much as he could kick tail, he could make us think a little, and laugh a lot.

Darn it's hard writing about this.

I just found out a few minutes ago that Pat Morita has died. He was 73. He had as full a life as anyone could possibly have: going from detainee in a Japanese-American internment camp during World War II, to restaurant owner and computer industry worker, to professional actor and finally beloved American icon. Here's the story from the Associated Press via Yahoo! My friend Chad just posted a really neat tribute to Morita over at his blog too. I imagine a lot of people are going to be stopping today to remember this man who figured so greatly in our pop culture's mind.

Rest in peace, sensei Morita. And bonzai!

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HBO may deny Rome a second season?!?

Ain't It Cool News is reporting that HBO - which apparently had previously greenlit a second season of Rome - may now be having second thoughts on any further installments of the hit show.

If HBO did this, they will have truly joined the ranks of the galactically stupid. Rome is one of the best shows on TV right now, maybe even one of the best ever attempted. The producers have taken already great history and turned it into a well-executed bloodthirsty gangster drama: like I said before, it's The Sopranos B.C. The show has only gotten better as it's progressed, the detail is opulent beyond belief, the action sequences are stupendous, and Titus Pullo is now officially one of the most serious bad-a$$es in television history (I'm still hearing "Thirteen!" in my head after the episode "The Spoils"). HBO had darned well better not cancel Rome!! But then, they had already cancelled Carnivale: another show that was one of the very few actually worth your valuable time watching. I'm still dying to see how THAT was going to all resolve itself. Now it looks as if we won't see the aftermath of Caesar's assassination play out. Well, what else can I say: if this is true, "Screw you HBO!"

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Happy Thanksgiving! And an after-action report

First of all, hope you and yours are having a really terrific holiday today...Oh yeah, Lisa was sent something that I think is just too darned hilarious not to make a mention of. Mash down here for a really wicked Flash movie that's just perfect for this day.

The main turkey we were using for Thanksgiving dinner today came out very beautiful. It not only looked terrific, it was by far the best one I've yet done. I left my camera at my parents' house though, so I can't upload the pictures of it just yet. Will pick it up tomorrow and post then.

The second bird, the smaller turkey breast that I juiced-up with Marinade X - my highly experimental concoction - couldn't be done today. We had a dilly of a time keeping the burner going in spite of the fierce winds we had today. It was nice today for the most part: unseasonably warm for this time of November. But the wind was a #&@%. Although we got the first bird done, when we came back after dinner to fry up the second it was just too windy to sustain a flame. We're going to try again tomorrow (and marinade another one with regular garlic butter).

Otherwise though, it was a pretty good Thanksgiving. We came home with plenty of leftovers, including turkey (yum!) and practically an entire German chocolate pie. Lot of good family getting together at my aunt and uncle's joint. Plenty of kids running around and this time there was some asking about when Lisa and I would be making our own contribution to that. Heh-heh... who knows, maybe sooner than anyone realizes... parse that as you will ;-)

Okay, hope y'all are doing well this Thanksgiving 2005. Now remember to get to bed early tonight: the stores open early tomorrow (during which I'm going to try to stock up on plenty of Star Wars action figures :-) Sees ya later!

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"Marinade X"

The above syringe is my biggest turkey injector. It contains a substance that until a few hours ago had never existed in the history of mankind. I have no idea how this is going to work. It could make a turkey extremely delicious... or not. It's definitely not the usual marinade (for which I used Tony Chachere's brand of Creole style butter for the main Thanksgiving turkey). I'm somewhat reluctant to admit right now what exactly went into this strange brew, apart from being able to say that butter was one of the necessary ingredients. The test subject is a six-pound turkey breast, so if this screws up the damage won't spread to the main dinner table: a fifteen pound full bird has that honor. We'll see how well this experimental formula does when we take it out of the fryer later today. Pray I don't kill anyone or myself with the mysterious Marinade X.

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TURKEY FRYING SAFETY: How to measure out your oil

Accidents involving turkey frying usually have one of the following three causes: leaving the fryer unattended (which should NEVER be done), trying to use the fryer indoors or beneath a shelter (often made of combustible material like wood, which is sorta like putting Drew Barrymore onboard the Hindenburg), or having an excess of oil in the pot that you are frying the bird in. And more often than not that last one happens because somebody didn't think twice about filling up the pot with as much oil as was readily available... without considering the displacement there would be after the bird was lowered in. Put simply: you don't need all that much oil to thoroughly (and safely) fry a bird in. Fortunately, there is a simple trick that you can do to accurately gauge how much peanut (or cottonseed, or in some cases vegetable) oil you'll actually need.

Before doing anything else with your turkey, while it's still wrapped-up in its plastic bag, put it in the bottom of your pot. Then start pouring cold water into the pot (I use a tea jug). Pour enough water in so that you can cover the top of the bird, plus maybe an extra inch more, but not much more (this is to accommodate for the base of the spit that you will have the turkey skewered onto). You should come several inches from the top of the pot. Then remove your turkey from the pot, and give the water a little bit of time to settle. At the water line, take a pencil and draw a dark-enough mark showing the depth of the water minus the bird. Then pour the water out. Here's some pics of me doing this earlier tonight...

You now have an accurate measure of how much oil you'll need to pour into the pot when it comes time to fry, that will allow for the extra mass of the bird when you add it to the cauldron.

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Thirty minutes into tonight's Lost...

It must be said: Ana Lucia is THE most trigger-happy character on television in the history of anything. What is this, like three or four times she's pulled a gun out on someone in less than a half-hour? Somebody knock this crazy woman out before she gets EVERYONE killed!

EDIT: It's now 9:52, a few minutes after we got to watch Ana Lucia put something like thirty seven bullet holes in some punk. Oh well... at least now we know something about why she's miffed at everything. Good episode.

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Sound and fury: Choosing the music is part of the ritual

I'm going to be posting a lot about the turkey frying tomorrow this night and into the morning. Partly, it's to share any experience or bits of wisdom I've picked up along the way that has to do with this. Although I've been frying for three years, I spent three years before that just reading up on it, and trying to convince myself that I really could do something this crazy. And partly, it's because for me this really has become an exquisite form of art. Turkey frying is really the only thing that we here in America have that's comparable to the Japanese art of preparing fugu. Unless you consider that if you mess fugu up, you don't usually burn up everything around you in the process...

Three years into our marriage and, I think this has become the first real tradition of our own little family. Someday my own son might want to try this, and I'll be there, showing him how to clean the bird, how to inject it with marinade, and then how to prepare the fryer and drop it into the oil. Something like carving the Thanksgiving turkey, only much more unforgiving of mistakes. This is going to be a "coming of age" ritual, a thing that marks passage into manhood, sorta. I think of myself as a pretty good fryer, and someday I will pass it on to those that will follow. Something like how my Dad has passed along the art of making knives to me (although I'm NOWHERE near as good as Dad :-)

Anyway, this tradition has already developed into a certain ritual that must be followed. I always wear my long-sleeved denim shirt. Always have on a good pair of boots. I wear hat and sunglasses while doing this. And there is always some background music blaring from the speakers of my car's stereo system.

In 2002 it was the soundtrack for The Fellowship of the Ring. In 2003 and 2004 I used the soundtrack for The Return of the King. Tonight I decided that in keeping with the theme of flames and searing heat, and that this being 2005, I am going to fry my birds to the soundtrack from Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. By the time it comes to "Battle of the Heroes" it should REALLY be coming along good, with those blasts of steam impregnated with the smell of marinade rising from the fryer.

Okay, off to watch Lost while the garlic butter sets in. More later.

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And so, it begins: This year's round of turkey-frying accidents

Bird #1 just received the first dose of marinade: the traditional garlic butter. Pumped nearly three bottles of the sauce into that turkey. I'll be working throughout the night making this just right to go into the hot oil tomorrow morning. Later on comes the cajun rub and more marinade. Bird #2 is a turkey breast that I'm making the subject of a somewhat experimental marinade. I've brewed up a diabolical concoction that, the theory is anyway, will render a VERY delicious bird. If this goes well I'll try it on a bigger bird come Christmas.

(BTW, special thanks to my good buddy lowbridge for posting on Free Republic my article from last year's Thanksgiving. You a good dude lowie :-)

Now, if you follow some pretty simple precautions, turkey frying can be relatively safe. You just gott be careful throughout the whole process. You must practice, as "Mad-Eye" Moody liked to scream out in the Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire novel, "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" And fortunately most turkey frying goes off without a hitch. But then, every year, we get stories like this: from the Register-Guard...

Fryer Smokes Bird, New House
By Rebecca Nolan
The Register-Guard
Published: Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Construction workers using a deep-fryer to cook a turkey Tuesday for an early Thanksgiving celebration burned a house they had just finished building.

The feast is an annual tradition for the crew, which was working at the Cozy Homes development on Mallory Lane, off Coburg Road in Eugene.

Cement worker Henry Schmerber bought a new propane fryer for the occasion and set it up inside the garage of the vacant house. Workers took turns watching the kettle.

But the fryer's thermometer was broken, and the oil inside got too hot, the workers said. The kettle started smoking and the lid rattled, as though the peanut oil inside had reached a boil.

Schmerber ran inside the garage and turned off the gas, but it was too late.

"The lid popped off," he said. "There must have been oil on it, because it hit the burner and ignited it."

The hot oil burned through the rubber propane line. Flames spread through the garage and up the front of the house, into a second-story room.

"The flames were as tall as the house," Schmerber said.

The men fought the blaze with a fire extinguisher, but the foam had no effect.

Eugene District Fire Chief Paul Dammen said the fire caused about $75,000 in damage. In all, 17 firefighters helped put out the blaze. The house was unsold, and the loss was insured.

Charred wood, insulation and other materials lay in a pile on the driveway. The front of the light green house was scorched and a twisted ceiling fan was visible through a shattered upstairs window, its blades warped by the heat.

Like an increasing number of Americans, Schmerber and his co-workers like the taste of deep-fried turkey. The technique began in the southern states and has gained popularity over the years. Cooking time is shortened and the meat stays juicier, advocates say.

Use of the fryer units remains controversial.

State Fire Marshal Nancy Orr on Monday urged Oregonians to use the fryers outdoors only and to keep an eye on the unit at all times.

"It's dangerous to use them on wooden decks or in garages," she said in a written statement.

The National Fire Protection Association's Web site discourages consumers from using deep fryers. (comment from me: WIMPS!!!)

The group warns heating as much as five gallons of oil to 350 degrees or more poses a "significant danger."

"The use of turkey fryers by consumers can lead to devastating burns, other injuries and the destruction of property," the group says.

But even after the fire, the men on Mallory Lane were determined to have their bird. They bought a second fryer and planned to cook up their feast later Tuesday afternoon in the backyard of a house across the street.

"We're gonna burn another house down," Schmerber joked.

Somehow I have the urge to start chanting "The Roof" after reading this story :-P

EDIT: Y'see, this is why you wanna be real careful when you play around with one of these things...

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From LP, to cassette, to CD... to USB flash drive?

The Barenaked Ladies are releasing their newest album, Barenaked on a Stick, on a 128 MB USB flash drive. The $30 drive includes 29 songs in MP3 format, photos, videos, and much more. The drive can play on PCs, Macs, and a lot of the newer audio equipment like some car stereos that have a USB port built-in.

For awhile now I've wondered what - if anything - might possibly supplant the CD as a medium for offline music purchases. I'm still not sold on buying my audio online: call me old-fashioned but I like having something tangible that I can hold in my hand for my money. It's way too early to see if this is really going to be a serious threat to CD, but this is still a pretty neat idea that the Barenaked Ladies have hit upon.

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Book review: Dark Lord: The Rise of Darth Vader

This is one I've been hankering for ever since news about it came out this past spring. Dark Lord: The Rise of Darth Vader by James Luceno is the first Star Wars novel to come out that's set in the time immediately following the events of Revenge of the Sith. It came out yesterday and I bought a copy after leaving work. It was a gripping enough read that I just finished it after plowing through it all this past evening. In Dark Lord, Luceno chronicles the first few weeks in the life of Darth Vader after he was "resurrected" on the slab in Darth Sidious' medical facility. And there's a certain grim humor that Luceno works into the story here, as we learn just how pathetic Vader really is, despite the fearsome countenance of his famous armor. Turns out that the medical droids did a p*ss-poor job in attaching the prosthetic limbs to the former Anakin Skywalker. His chest unit isn't working properly, the fabric of the outfit either catches on the cyborg parts or it bunches up where it's not supposed to, and the entire thing - especially when Vader walks or is kneeling in the presence of the Emperor - is just too uncomfortable to wear or move around in. Throughout the book Vader spends a lot of time not only acclimating himself to his new condition, but dealing with the vestiges of his former life that still linger. We see how a lot of the characters are faring post-Sith, such as Bail Organa: walking a tightrope between feigning loyalty to the Emperor and furthering the liberty of his people... while also hiding his adopted infant daughter and a certain pair of droids from the dark lord's attention. A ton of detail is given in this book about the power structure of the Empire, including the logistical demands that come with creating a military - virtually overnight - that is strong enough to keep subdued an entire galaxy. There is a subplot in this novel involving several Jedi who have somehow managed to escape the calamity of Order 66, and this is handled quite nicely and - somewhat like Forrest Gump - becomes the portal through which we witness what's happened to the more notable characters of the saga. But otherwise this novel is pure Empire, pure Sith... and pure Vader. I've been a huge fan of Luceno's work for some time now (I even wound up sitting right beside him during a panel discussion at Star Wars Celebration II a few years ago... why oh why didn't I ask for his autograph then?!), he probably ranks with Timothy Zahn as my favorite writer of Star Wars fiction, and in Dark Lord he definitely does not disappoint. Highly recommended whomping good read for any Star Wars fan.

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Shattered record

We have some special software here at school used to teach and test typing skills. Because I'm going to be using this with a few of my students, I thought it would be a good idea to become familiar with it. So a little while ago I gave myself a typing test.

The last time I measured myself like this, it was maybe five or six years ago. Back then I was typing an average of 120 words per minute... on a good day.

Today my typing speed clocked in at a whopping 153 gross words per minute with 100% accuracy.

Given how I was nothing but thumbs all over the keyboard when I first took typing in high school years ago, I'm rather pleased to see how far I've come :-)

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Last soldier of the "Christmas Truce" has passed away

Alfred Anderson, the last known British soldier who partook in the "Christmas Truce" of World War I, has died at the age of 109.

On December 25, 1914, an unofficial truce broke out between the British and German soldiers along the western front. The two warring armies laid down their arms and met each other in the no man's land that separated the opposing trenches. They drank together, gave each other cigarettes, traded tunic buttons, sang Christmas carols together, even played soccer. In some places along the front the truce lasted for a few days. And then the commanders on both sides ordered their men to start fighting each other again. But for a little while, there really had been peace on Earth and goodwill toward men...

Alfred Anderson may very well have been the last man who could remember what happened that day 91 years ago. His death leaves only ten British veterans of the Great War still with us. Of the more than two million American doughboys who fought in the conflict, there are roughly 50 left and possibly even less than that. Their numbers dwindle with each passing year.

More than 16 million men and women served in the United States armed forces by the time World War II drew to a close. Of those, only a quarter or so are with us still. It is estimated that we are losing our World War II veterans now at the rate of about one thousand per day.

I read a few days ago that of the 705 survivors of the Titanic, only three of them - all women - are still alive.

It is estimated that there are approximately one million survivors of the Holocaust in the world today. Many of them live in Israel and the United States.

I know that I must be realistic, and acknowledge that none of us are meant to linger forever. And I do have faith that there is something much more that is awaiting us beyond this realm of crude matter... something wonderful, even. But as a historian it does sadden me terribly, knowing that one by one those who have connected us to some of the most significant events of the twentieth century are being taken from this world and into eternity.

Alfred Anderson, wherever you are: you've earned a good rest. Welcome home, soldier.

EDIT: I found a GREAT website that has full-color photographs from World War I! Check out www.greatwar.nl for some really vivid images of the war.

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Top geek novels of all time

The top 20 geek novels have been voted on by readers of the Guardian. I will admit to having read nine of these novels, including eight in the top ten. Some of these I've never heard of before. Others I've wanted to read at some point but haven't had a chance to do so yet. A few of these - like Nineteen Eighty-Four and Dune - I credit with playing a big part in my personal development. Am kinda surprised to see Watchmen here as it's not strictly a novel per se, but it easily ranks as one of the greatest works of English literature in the past 25 years, so it's got that going for it. Anyhoo, here's the complete list...

1. The HitchHiker's Guide to the Galaxy -- Douglas Adams
2. Nineteen Eighty-Four -- George Orwell
3. Brave New World -- Aldous Huxley
4. Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? -- Philip Dick
5. Neuromancer -- William Gibson
6. Dune -- Frank Herbert
7. I, Robot -- Isaac Asimov
8. Foundation -- Isaac Asimov
9. The Colour of Magic -- Terry Pratchett
10. Microserfs -- Douglas Coupland
11. Snow Crash -- Neal Stephenson
12. Watchmen -- Alan Moore & Dave Gibbons
13. Cryptonomicon -- Neal Stephenson
14. Consider Phlebas -- Iain M Banks
15. Stranger in a Strange Land -- Robert Heinlein
16. The Man in the High Castle -- Philip K Dick
17. American Gods -- Neil Gaiman
18. The Diamond Age -- Neal Stephenson
19. The Illuminatus! Trilogy -- Robert Shea & Robert Anton Wilson
20. Trouble with Lichen - John Wyndham

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Great Caesar's ghost! Tonight's Rome rocks!!

Well the credits are rolling right now on the final episode for this first season of Rome on HBO. I must say this show became far more wildly entertaining than I was first expecting it to be: it's like The Sopranos B.C. Can't say that tonight's events weren't totally unexpected. I mean, we know how history proceeded after Julius Caesar became emperor. Anyone who ever read Shakespeare's play in high school will remember how this unfolds. Yet the show's producers (which includes John Milius of Conan the Barbarian fame) still made this something that felt like you didn't see coming. Guess it had to do with how brutal they made the actual thing go down. Anyone who's been following the tale of Lucius Vorenus is going to get hit with a whammy too. The final scene showing Titus Pullo is a little bit of a surprise, given what happened a couple episodes back (remember that guy he gave the severe headache too?). Anyway, tonight's Rome really packs a whallop. Be sure and catch it when it encores on HBO during this coming week.

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"Who is Number One?"

From the "You have got to be kidding me!" files: a remake of the 1960s TV series The Prisoner is being worked on by Sky One over in Great Britain. It doesn't sound as if it'll be much like the original show though as "liberties" are being taken. My opinion: this one won't fly. The original The Prisoner is by far THE most bizarre thing ever done for television. If you want some seriously nutty watching just check out its final episode. And what the heck was that "Rover" thing anyway? I could see a The Prisoner movie being done in the tone of the original though, maybe starring George Clooney and featuring special effects by ILM. But without the strangeness quotient anything new for television will get stale fast.

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Bush betrays Chinese Christians: Is state-sponsored church a real "church" at all?

CNN is reporting that President Bush attended services at a government-sanctioned church in China today. Which is odd because Bush does not attend services at any church while he is home in America, but I digress from the point of this discussion...

There are two kinds of churches in communist China. There are the "approved" state-allowed churches, and the only real reason that the Chinese government has lately tolerated any Christian churches at all is that it wants to improve its image in the lead-up to the 2008 Beijing Olympics. There are three "movements" making up the state-run churches: the Three-Self Patriotic Movement, the China Christian Council, and what passes as Catholicism in China. And guess what: all of them owe their first loyalty to the state, which has absolute control over the congregations. The government taps the pastors (it can even install priests in the Catholic churches without Vatican say-so), decides what will and what will not be preached, keeps everything pertaining to them on a tight leash. If you want to worship in a church in China without fear of reprisal, you have no choice but to enter the doors of a state-sponsored congregation.

And then there are the underground "house churches". Which from my perspective are the ONLY real Christian churches that exist in China. This is the true persecuted church in this world. Worshipping in a house church is an offense that can get you arrested, imprisoned, and sometimes even executed. Just a few days ago several Chinese "house Christians" were sentenced to lengthy prison terms for running an underground church and distributing illegal copies of the Bible.

The underground church in China is one of the most brutalized and hunted-down religious movements in world history. And yet the adversity is causing growth: the house churches are widely considered to be the most active and thriving churches in China, in spite of the threats facing it. Nonetheless, most Christians in China still face dire consequences if they are ever caught practicing their faith without license from the government.

By attending a state-run church, Bush has effectively thumbed his nose at those Christians who live by faith in God alone, instead of kow-towing to what other men would have them do. He even dared suggest that the state churches are smiled upon by God when he said at the service that "The spirit of the Lord is very strong inside your church."

Christians are supposed to be baptised in the name of God, and not in the name of any government. The moment they seek counsel from worldly authority as to how they are to approach God, they cease being of God and fall back under the spiritual jurisdiction of this carnal realm.

If President Bush wanted to act like a real leader - and especially a Christian leader - he would have rebuffed the state-sanctioned churches entirely. He would have readily understood that the church can not be an institution that acts with the approval of temporal government.But once again, the "leaders" of this country have shown a willingness to demonstrate that they seek to honor the god of this world, instead of honoring the God of Heaven. It is more important to Bush and too many other politicians that the Chinese government be placated for the vast market it controls, instead of made to answer for its harsh treatment of those who merely wish to serve and worship God as their consciences - and not their own politicians - would so lead them to do.

And some people wonder why it is that I am so disgusted with so many professing "Christians" in America.

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