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Wednesday, May 09, 2018

Video Post: Stop Hating Donald Trump!

So this is not only the first video blog post I've made in... well a VERY long time.  It's also the absolutely FIRST blog post that I've made about now-President Donald Trump ever!

To be fair though, it's not about Trump himself.  It's about what I've seen waaaaay too much of in the way of hatred toward the guy.  It's not warranted and it's not worth it.  Anyhoo, roll the clip!


Tuesday, May 08, 2018

Snoke is just a gigolo

Had to get a few supplies yesterday and on a lark I went to the Star Wars toys to ogle the stuff from the upcoming Solo movie.  The timing was fortuitous apparently because some fresh figures had just been put on the pegs including... gasp!... one of the new Supreme Leader Snoke 3.75 scale figs!

"AYYYYYY ain't got no-BAAAH-day!"
Ever since The Force Awakens I've been wanting a Snoke action figure.  Most of my own Star Wars collection got sold a few years ago before I left North Carolina.  The thing about collecting Star Wars: you don't need to get everything.  Just whatever interests you.  Some collect nothing but Artoo-Detoo memorabilia, others for Yoda and some are into Darth Vader.  Snoke has intrigued me from the moment I saw him and now my new collection is complete for now.

But in all seriousness...

EVERY time I see a picture of Snoke from The Last Jedi - either as a still from the movie or as a toy - in that ridiculous gold lamé bathrobe and matching slippers it makes David Lee Roth's voice singing "Just A Gigolo" start playing in my head:



Could be worse, I suppose. I mean, Kylo Ren's waist supporter didn't get much screen time after all, right?

Monday, May 07, 2018

Some musing on the meaning for life

A thought:
Earth is the only world out of countless trillions spread across the universe that holds the perfect conditions for life, because the universe needed to be seen and recognized and appreciated.  The universe requires life to justify its existence and give it meaning.  Even if that life is constrained to one small speck of dust in the limitless cosmos.
Had there been no life whatsoever anywhere with consciousness and sentience to acknowledge and accept and observe the universe, would the universe exist at all?
Either the universe alone created life on Earth for its own sake, or something higher than the universe itself created life on Earth with conscious intent.  Which followed to its logical conclusion means that the universe as an entire reality is created with conscious intent.
Merely something that's been on my mind the past week or so...

Karl Marx's real gift to the world...

Perhaps if Ambrose Bierce were still with us (and who knows, we don't know what became of him since he disappeared somewhere in Mexico during its revolution) he might have made the following addition to his famous work The Devil's Dictionary:

COMMUNISM, n.
A simple idea, that with innocent charm and seductive promise makes monsters of men.

"It just hasn't been attempted correctly!"  How many times are we going to hear that one?  Looking around the past few days at the celebrations of the 200th birthday of Karl Marx, my head cannot but shake in disbelief.  That even today, there are many who will scream that communism will not only work but be a raging success... if the right people could be in charge of it.  And of course they will claim that they are the very "right people" who should be at the controls and trusted to guide the people into a bright and shining socialist utopia free of hunger and suffering.

Except, it has never worked out that way.  And it never can work out that way.  And every time that Marxism in whatever form it takes has been attempted, the result has invariably been the same: a small oligarchy at the top of the heap living in excess at the expense of "the workers".  You know, the very same ones who were promised that utopia to begin with.

It never happens.  But would you like to know what might happen, what will probably happen given enough time and what HAS happened?

Thousands if not millions dead from starvation, political purges and outright incompetence.  And often even armed conflict with neighboring countries or countries thousands of miles across an ocean basin away.

I'm historian enough to admit: no social system is perfect.  No legal system is perfect.  No system of government at all is perfect.  But at least some of them allow for a striving toward that perfect ideal within the boundaries of human dignity and the acknowledgement that life is sacred and worth defending for its own sake.  That the individual deserves a chance to be successful, even if that success doesn't work out as it was envisioned.

Communism, and socialism in general for that matter, brooks no favor for that.  It is an ideology for its own sake.  To its adherents, other people are grist for the mill on the way to that glorious promised paradise.  And it tolerates no dissent or individual effort.  Try to break away from the will of the masses as determined by those few at the top, and you'll end up with a bullet in the skull, or smothered with a plastic bag, or wasting away from caloric intake being rendered zero, or sent off to fight and die for the good of the state.

In short: communism can never improve on itself, as is possible with republican government and capitalist economy.  Communism can do nothing except stave off the inevitable demise of the countries that have adopted it... and in the end, none can be spared from its death throes as it desperately tries to survive at all costs.

All of this and more stems from the "radical and revolutionary" philosophies of Karl Marx.

How this merits commemoration as a virtue of societal evolution, is something that boggles my mind and no doubt forever will.


Saturday, May 05, 2018

The premiere of SATURDAY NIGHT MASSACRES!

If you were to timewarp to some day many decades hence (I hope, gulp!) and find me about to depart this moral realm for the Great Beyond, and of all the questions you could ask me the one thing you would want to know is "What were your favorite websites of all time?"...

Even then, one of the top three would be WWWF Grudge Match: that hilarious page from the earliest days of widespread accessible Internet featuring epic battles between Mister T and Mister Clean, a Rottweiler versus a Rottweiler's weight in chihuahas, John McClane versus the Death Star, and that immortal bout between English Soccer Hooligans and the French Army.  Grudge Match ran uninterrupted in a few iterations between 1995 and 2005, but its impact on Internet humor will ever live on.

Thing is... since 2005 there's been so much crazy new stuff come about that's just SCREAMING to be put into a Grudge Match-style.

Just for fun, the past several months I've been making posts on my personal Facebook page with match-ups between various characters from fiction, real life, whatever.  Those who will courageously admit to knowing me seem rather entertained by it.  And so I thought "hmmmm... maybe this could be made wide open for others?  Perhaps honor the spirit of the original Grudge Match and make it appreciable for a modern audience?"

And so it is that as of today Saturday Night Massacres has been launched on Facebook.


Barring unforeseen circumstance, every other Saturday at noon EST there will be a new battle between two or more combatants, and they could come from anywhere: the real world, movies, books, television, games, sports, ancient mythology, toys, politics... anything and everything is in play.  All in good humor, all in good taste (which is sadly something that too much "comedy" these days is not).  Nothing cruel or mean-spirited, just good clean wholesome family carnage.  For two weeks the matchup will be active and if you've a Facebook account (ehhhhh... "I have no further comment Senator") you can cast your vote.  At the end of two weeks voting ends and the victor will be declared.  And then a whole new contest will begin!  As things stand now, there are matches in the pipeline that will carry us well into late summer.  And new ones are being thought up all the time.  Fans of the page will always be free and welcome to suggest future matchups (with proper accreditation of course).

And for the inaugural edition of Saturday Night Massacres, it's a good one:



Archery contest between Robin Hood - the legendary defender of the poor and downtrodden - and Katniss Everdeen - the "Girl on Fire" herself and champion of District 12 - and only one of them will take dinner home for his or her friends and family.  High stakes indeed!

So let fly those arrows and vote now for the winner at Saturday Night Massacres!




Friday, May 04, 2018

Star Wars: Making sense (?!?) of THE LAST JEDI internal timeline

Okay, this is probably going to fanwank me into utter oblivion but since today is the quasi-holiday of May the Fourth and in light of the festivities here are some thoughts - that have been nagging at a lot of us these past few months - about Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi...
Taken at face value the internal chronology makes little to NO sense whatsoever. There is ENORMOUS incongruity between the events of the Rey and Luke, and the Resistance fleet, and Finn and Rose, and even Kylo Ren and Snoke. And it's bugged the mynocks out of me... until I began studying this film alongside The Force Awakens and now... it kinda jibes pretty well after all.
(Mind ya though, these are the words of a maniac who once upon a time composed a mini-doctoral thesis explaining away midi-chlorians. So parse all of this as you may.)
The key is bearing in mind what the opening crawl of The Last Jedi tells us from the very start: the First Order has struck across the galaxy. In the aftermath of the destruction of Starkiller Base, Snoke isn't playing in the shadows anymore. He's laying ALL his cards on the table and the First Order has come out of the Unknown Regions to take the galaxy in a cosmic blitzkrieg. As crazy as it sounds, the First Order is apparently more powerful militarily than the Empire was, if it's being able to assault the former Republic worlds on all fronts. This was sadly understated across the span of the film (though I suspect it will be emphasized in Episode 9).
This did not transpire instantaneously after Rey left the Resistance base to find Luke. In fact, it was likely several days between her departure and the First Order fleet's arrival at D'Qar. Snoke was taking his time coordinating the invasion of the civilized galaxy. It was also during this time that Kylo Ren was recovering from the wounds he received from the duel in the forest on Starkiller Base (and that hit in the leg from Chewie's bowcaster). General Hux had to rendezvous with the Supremacy and Kylo got bacta treatment, stitched etc. before appearing before Snoke. That all takes time.
Meanwhile, some days after leaving the Resistance base, Rey arrives at Ahch-To and finds Luke Skywalker. And she is NOT going to persuade him quickly by any measure to get back into the fight. It's likely, given the changes in weather and time of day, that she spends a number of days following Luke around the island.
And that is a beautiful thing, actually. This is a common motif in the story of master and apprentice: the aspiring student having to demonstrate patience and tenacity and a refusal to surrender, until at last the master takes him or her on as an apprentice. As Rey told Luke, she has seen his daily routine: intimating that she has had time to understand how he spends his time in self-imposed exile.
So again, there are several days between Rey's departure and when Luke acquiesces and concurrently several days between the First Order's galaxy-wide assault and its arrival at D'Qar. Why didn't Snoke come out and hit the Resistance immediately? Well, for all how they have just broken his new toy, he still considers them a minor nuisance at best in the greater scheme of things. The bigger threat is Skywalker returning and that's not necessarily something to be solved with all-out military action. So the First Order is taking its time. And only when it is unavoidably clear that the First Order is en route does Leia begin a proper evacuation. Which underscores why there wasn't frantic fleeing from the base at the end of The Force Awakens.
And when the First Order does arrive, it is several MORE days possibly between the jump into hyperspace by the Resistance fleet and its arrival on the outskirts of the Crait system. And it's not long after that when the Supremacy and its entourage arrives. And so begins the long slow pursuit across realspace.
(Kylo enters Snoke's chambers after he's sufficiently recovered, which is after the battle at D'Qar. Again, a clue that The Last Jedi's series of events are more protracted out than is initially assumed ).
So why didn't the First Order simply sent a second task force to jump in front of the Resistance ships and end them all there? Two reasons. The first is that the First Order has committed ALL its military resources to attack systems of the former New Republic. Likely a reinforcement for the pursuit of the  Resistance couldn't be spared.
More likely though: Snoke is being cruel. Making Leia and her comrades suffer the agony of knowing they've limited fuel, limited time, limited life left to them. It's prolonged psychological sadism and Snoke is reveling in it. He's enjoying every moment of this crawl across space, picking the Resistance fleet off one vessel at a time.
Now here is the wild supposition on my part. I've a sense that Finn and Rose were off to Canto Bight and back in much longer than within 18 hours.



How it works out fuel-wise for the Resistance fleet, I can't explain unless that was their overall optimum fuel supply before hitting reserves (which has a real world analogy, by the way). Finn and Rose and Poe must have figured that there was some time afforded them though, 'cuz there sure doesn't seem to be utter desperation on their part. I mean, Rose takes time to admire the fathiers racing, fercryinoutloud! So again, possibly a few days travel to Canto Bight, finding the Master Codebreaker (or someone loosely approximating him) and then getting aboard the Supremacy.
It was during the time that the Resistance fleet was in hyperspace on the way to Crait and then for much of Finn and Rose's mission that Luke was teaching Rey, and also Rey and Kylo Ren's "communion" through the Force. And it was a number of days after Rey abandoned Luke before the Millennium Falcon dropped her off in an escape pod to be captured by the First Order. When she is taken captive, at that same time Finn and Rose and DJ are infiltrating the Supremacy to find the hyperspace tracking device.
And it is at this point that the separate chronologies of the film at last convene and take place simultaneously. Everyone is at Crait and the final moves of this chapter of the saga begin to play out.



Between Rey and Chewie and Artoo taking off on the Falcon in the final minutes of The Force Awakens and that coming together of all the elements in The Last Jedi, there could have been a week or even TWO weeks or more of "story time".
But, it really doesn't matter in the end. Star Wars is after all a legend. And no legend is without the quality of being protean and open to interpretation.



Just my two Republic credits...

Saturday, April 28, 2018

Alfie Evans and Prince Louis: A Tale of Two Britains

While the western world has been obsessed this week with a baby boy born into a family that to be perfectly honest lives in ultimate luxury while producing nothing but a tourism industry and fodder for gossip magazines, another little boy - born to parents who work hard to provide a happy home without need or desire for celebrity - was denied nourishment and life support by order of the High Court in Great Britain.

But few people outside of England, it seems, heard or ever bothered to hear about Alfie Hastings, who had a severe brain condition.


His parents and others tried their very best to save his life, but the judges of Britain decreed that Alfie was a lost cause and a drain on the system.  And so Alfie should die.

Which, he now has.  As of this past hour or so.

Louis and Alfie.  Baby boys born in the same country.  One will never know want or hunger or discomfort, the other has been taken from a Mommy and Daddy who loved him very much and did everything they could to give him a fighting chance to live.

If the situation had been reversed, and Prince William and Kate given birth to a child with the same medical condition as Alfie Evans... would the British courts have ordered and enforced a mandate that their baby boy must die?