I've gone mad for Monsterpocalypse!

A lot of you probably remember how over the summer I made this video on behalf of HyperMind - that groovy game store in Burlington - for a contest entry. It was for the Monsterpocapalooza event sponsored by Privateer Press for that company's Monsterpocalypse collectible miniatures game. Well as is usual whenever I'm about to get involved with something, I research the bejeebers out of it! I never get involved with a project regarding something new to me without giving it the hard hairy eyeball and reading everything that I can find on the subject. The store's owners gave me a copy of the Monsterpocalypse rulebook and I scoured the Internet for whatever I could find, and in the end we banged out a darn good video. It even made the top ten of the Monsterpocapalooza finalists. And I also have a nice letter from the president of the company praising how we parodied Cloverfield with it!

Along with the letter, Privateer Press also sent over some boxes of limited edition minis from the game. Between seeing how pretty those were, and observing how everyone in the store was way enjoying Monsterpocalypse, it was more than enough to entice me to give it a try. And that's how it all started...

So now five months and several booster box purchases later (in addition to scouring eBay for a few hard-to-find minis) I must confess: I am officially a Monsterpocalypse junkie.

Awright well, what exactly is Monsterpocalypse and why am I feeling obligated to sing its praises here? It's a game based around the "giant monsters" genre... and it's a heck of a lot of fun!!

Monsterpocalypse is a game between two players (although some ambitious folks have created custom maps that let four, six and even eight people play against each other). The game is played on a playmat. On each player's side of the mat there's "storage" spaces for your various units and both forms of your monster (more on that later) along with "wells" for your various dice. Taking up the bulk of the mat is the city map, arranged in a grid. At the beginning of the game players take turns putting various building figures onto the map, constructing a city that they will soon proceed to destroy.

Gameplay revolves greatly around how you use your dice. You've got ten "action dice", ten "power dice" and you can use any number of "boost dice" depending on what figure you're using and other factors. If you want to "spawn" a unit - which are classified as either grunts or elites - onto the board you have to spend a die (and it'll cost ya two dice for an elite). Want to move a unit? It'll cost ya one die. Attack with it? That'll cost ya a die as well. But "spending" means moving the dice from your unit pool to your monster pool... which will let you wreck even more carnage with your big monster. So there's not only a lot of strategic thinkin' that Monsterpocalypse calls for, but also a good sense of economics and wisely using your resources. If all that sounds too complex, don't worry: it's not. Games are usually very fast paced and most last under an hour. Hey, this is about ginormous monstrosities unleashing death and destruction, not... chess!

The object of the game is to destroy your opponent's monster. Which ain't as simple as it sounds. Ya see, you and the other player actually have two figures representing each of your respective monsters! The primary is the "alpha" form, which is what that monster looks like in its natural state. But accumulate enough power dice (earned by destroying units and brawling building into rubble) and you can switch your monster from its alpha to its "hyper" form: a bit more powerful and often with even cooler abilities than the alpha. Your goal in Monsterpocalypse is to inflict enough damage that both of the other player's monster forms have zero on their health trackers.

Monsterpocalypse came out a year ago and it's become a huge success for Privateer Press. When the game first came out it introduced its first six factions: G.U.A.R.D. (sorta like G.I. Joe or S.H.I.E.L.D. from the Marvel comics), Martian Menace (from the red planet), Lords of Cthul (my personal favorite faction, take a guess why), Terrasaurs (think Godzilla's kinfolk hooking up with radical environmentalist terrorist wackos), Planet Eaters (also a favorite) and Shadow Sun Syndicate (sorta like the Power Rangers on steroids). Last month Series 4 of the game, Monsterpocalypse Now! was released and rolled out six new factions: Elemental Champions, Tritons (a threat from the ocean), Savage Swarm (Them!? You'll wish it was just them), Subterran Uprising (molemen... really big molemen), UberCorp International (run by a thinly-veiled parody of Howard Hughes) and a group that's fast running up players' lists of most-liked factions, the Empire of the Apes (see the gun that Kong-sized gorilla is wielding? That's really a salvaged howitzer).

So, all of this sound like oodles of fun? It most certainly is! Nothing feels quite like building up a town only to thrash it to pieces with exotic weaponry and kaiju critters. And you can find Monsterpocalypse at most of your friendly local game stores. A lot of those usually have a dedicated group of players that meet regularly. I've started playing at HyperMind in Burlington on Thursday nights, and we've a good bunch that congregates there (including one particular 11-year old who handed my butt to me with his Subterrans last night despite my use of G.U.A.R.D.'s heavy air support... but he won the Mega Mantacon figure and is happy, so it's all fine :-).

One of my favorite online resources for all things Monsterpocalyse is Team Covenant and if you're looking for any particular figures, Team Covenant's online store is well worth visiting! They not only carry the starter box sets and boosters but also special bundles and some very good custom Monsterpocalypse dice that if you start getting heavy into this game you might wanna consider getting, 'cuz the blast markings on the regular dice have a tendency to "wear off" after several games. And 'course there's also eBay, that good ol' standby (and maybe your last, best hope of scoring a Mega Yasheth figure... hey, I am big into the Lords of Cthul, y'all ;-) And it goes without saying that the official Monsterpocalypse website is a must-see if you're thinking of getting into this game. Privateer Press just overhauled the site and among other things there's a gallery featuring every mini the game has to date, including stats. There's also a lively message board for players to discuss various aspects of the game.

Monsterpocalypse gets this blog's highest recommendation for entertainment worth checking out. There's a little something for players of all ages to enjoy... and they certainly do. And if you're in this part of North Carolina, drop me a line at theknightshift@gmail.com and let's see if we can hook up and play a round some evening :-)

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A Dr. Horrible fan-film?! HORRIBLE TURN is pretty darned good!

While we're waiting for Joss Whedon to deliver up some more Dr. Horrible goodness, here's something that will both entertain and astound ya: Horrible Turn. It's an hour-long unofficial prequel to Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog!

Sometime in the early Nineties, young Billy is pining for a cute Australian exchange student at his school. He's also wound up helping a fellow student named Hammerstein pass his grade. Meanwhile, a group calling itself the Evil League of Evil - led by the mysterious "Bad Horse" - has just staged its first attack on the city.

And in case you're wondering YES: Horrible Turn is a musical! The production quality is quite on par with what we saw in Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog last year. Click on the link to watch Horrible Turn on YouTube or on Vimeo.

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This is a photograph of the sun

Many of us in this part of North Carolina no longer remember what it looks like. There is a rumor about that today we might finally see it again.

(Curse you Hurricane Ida!)

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DVD, made of stone, that lasts a thousand years

Startup company Cranberry has unveiled its DiamonDisc: a DVD that stores your data by etching it in stone... literally. The disc is composed of synthetic stone that a high-intensity laser burns the data into, creating a DVD said to be perfectly compatible with all DVD drives and players. But amazingly, Cranberry claims that the DiamonDisc will keep your data safe for a thousand years.

(Whether there will be DVD players in the year 3009 is a whole 'nother matter.)

You can send your data to Cranberry to have it burned by them. Or you can buy the DiamonDisc recorder for your own use, for the low price of $4,995. But that also gets you 150 DiamonDiscs that currently run $34.95 each when bought separately.

Personally, I think the major studios should adopt this new technology for the home market. And the first movie that gets this "recorded in stone" treatment deserves to be The Ten Commandments :-P

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Man arrested for phone sex calls... to 911

The Smoking Gun has published the mug shot and police report of one Joshua Basso, a Florida man who's currently in the pokey after making numerous telephone calls to a woman, asking crude questions about her breast size and then queried her about engaging in erotic activities.

That's gonna land him in court for sure. Except that Basso also made all of his calls to 911. There's gonna be a bunch more charges against him for abusing the 911 system.

Why did he do it? Basso claimed that his LG cell phone was out of minutes and that he "called 911 because it was free".

This guy wasn't just stupid: he was stoopid!

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MPAA shuts down town's entire Wi-Fi over one download

Coshocton, Ohio is a town without free Internet. Thank the Motion Picture Association of America, which successfully turned off Coshocton's Wi-Fi connection to the world because, allegedly, one person used the wireless access to download a copyrighted movie.

In addition to being of great benefit to out-of-town tourists and business people, the Coshocton County Sheriff's Department personnel have found the Wi-Fi service to be a tremendous convenience by letting then file an accident or incident report without having to leave their vehicles. That's no more, because the MPAA somehow mustered up enough power to violate the Geneva Convention and subject everyone in town to collective punishment.

(Just one more reason why the Digital Millennium Copyright Act needs to be mutilated beyond all possible recognition.)

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Just typical life in Reidsville...

According to the News & Record out of Greensboro, at 3 a.m. this past Tuesday morning the South Scales Street Market here in Reidsville was robbed. Someone broke through the glass door of the store and proceeded to pilfer the place.

The assailant made of with more than $2,700 worth of cigarettes and $50 worth of condoms!

(You can insert your own clever joke here.)

I swear, more and more this town is resembling the one from Hobo with a Shotgun...

We need that guy patrolling the downtown area! :-)

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School in North Carolina caught selling grades for cash

Rosewood Middle School in Goldsboro, North Carolina is in a money crunch like many schools across the country. So like most of those schools it held a fundraiser last year, selling chocolate candy bars.

But that didn't raise anything. So with the principal's blessing, Rosewood Middle embarked on a new scheme...

The school began selling grades.

For $20, a student would be able to add 20 points to a test grade: 10 points on two tests of the pupil's choosing. Enough to raise a B to an A or possibly make a failing grade a marginally passing D.

Read all about it on the website of the News & Observer, which caught wind of the plot and ratted the school out. School administrators are now stopping the "fundraiser" and refunding any and all donations that might have been made (Rosewood Middle's principal Susie Shepherd said that the plan had elicited no money yet anyway).

Just... wow. I guess if this had gone forward that a kid with rich parents could buy himself into the Beta Club even if his grades otherwise sucked.

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Charlie Chaplin stars in THE MATRIX

It could use some piano accompaniment. And the cards need some serious cleaning-up of translation. But those aside, this is still very clever: The Matrix as an old-timey silent movie featuring Charlie Chaplin!

That "dojo" scene is especially Chaplin-esque :-)

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25 days until THE BEST CHRISTMAS PAGEANT EVER

Last night we had the first rehearsal of the fire scene for Theatre Guild of Rockingham County's production of The Best Christmas Pageant Ever and it was a scream! "Well-choreographed chaos" is the best way to put it. And lo and behold, as a Fireman I get to be right in the center of it all! Some terrific hijinks ensue in just a minute or two of performance time and we more or less got it all nailed down pat last night. Well, 'cept for doing it in costume 'course.

And speaking of that, tonight the three of us in the Fireman roles dropped by a local fire department to get equipped with our firefighter's coats and pants. I'd never worn full fire gear before. The stuff is so bulky that I felt like I was wearing C.O.G. armor from a Gears of War game. And I've got to run up the aisle and onto the stage in that getup. Good times, aye?

Well, y'all will have a chance to see it all come together on December 4th, 5th and 6th. TGRC-NC.com has more details including ticket pricing and ordering. Hope to see ya there!

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Second episode of ABC's new V just aired

I'm still enjoying this re-imagined V (slam here for my review of the pilot episode). ABC is doing a fine job of updating the concepts of the original. However, I'm more than a little compelled to say that this show needs to ratchet up the intensity. Tonight's episode "There is No Normal Anymore" picked up right after the end of last week's premiere, and then hit a plodding stride.

Maybe this is still just "setup" for a bigger payoff later. I hope so, because V has tons of potential. But unless there's some master arc plan in the works that we aren't aware of the show is taking its own sweet time more than Babylon 5 did, or Ronald Moore's Battlestar Galactica. It worked very well on those series and it can work just as well now, but V's showrunners need to pick up the pace bigtime, or all the interest it's enjoying now will peter out fast.

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Worst recent Supreme Court decision now wasted: Pfizer abandons New London

Few things convinced me that this country has gone completely off the rails more than did Kelo v. City of New London: the horrendous decision by the Supreme Court in 2005.

To recap: the city of New London, Connecticut set about in the late Nineties to use eminent domain to seize the land of private homeowners... so that it could lure big companies like pharmaceutical giant Pfizer to the area and sell them the same property! It was the very worst example of stealing from Peter to give to Paul.

How did the elected officials of New London justify this outrageous action? By claiming that seizing the property of Suzette Kelo and other homeowners and giving it to major industry, that they would be building up the tax base of New London. It was for a "public good", ya see. At least that's how they described it.

Suzette Kelo and her neighbors took New London to court. And it reached all the way to the United States Supreme Court. And on June 23rd 2005 the Supremes ruled 5 to 4 that... New London and any municipality has the right to seize private land and sell it to other private interests!

(The five idiots - I don't dare refer to them as "honorable Justices" - who voted for this were Stevens, Kennedy, Souter, Ginsburg, and Breyer.)

So New London seized all of the property, bulldozed the houses into rubble, and went ahead with its plans to sell the land to Pfizer.

And now, Pfizer is abandoning New London, Connecticut entirely.

All that New London has to show for its efforts is a field strewn with rubble and waste. Suzette Kelo and the rest wound up with nothing at all.

If there is no such thing as respect for property rights in this country, then there is no respect for rights at all. Kelo v. City of New London had already demonstrated that. Pfizer moving out is in many ways New London adding insult to injury.

Will the lesson be heeded by others? Probably not.

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Happy 40th birthday SESAME STREET!

"You've never seen a street like Sesame Street. Everything happens here. You're gonna love it."

-- Gordon (played by Matt Robinson)
the first words spoken on the first episode of Sesame Street
November 10th, 1969

Forty years ago today a new kind of television burst onto the scene. It was an educational program, but one that eschewed dour and boring lessons. Instead, fast-paced skits and high-brow humor were to be the norm.

And the cast of characters of this new show? An eclectic mix of adults, children, puppets, monsters, grouches... and one very big bird.

Forty years later and Sesame Street is still going strong! And after all this time Gordon is still right: we've never seen a street anything like Sesame Street. Everything does and has happened there.

And we're still loving it.

So you know, what better time than this to put up another classic Sesame Street video? Except I've posted so many of them already! Which one should I use?

I know: how about this classic sketch featuring Grover and Fat Blue, in which Grover recommends the "little" hamburger!

Now that's comedy!! :-)

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Homeland Security is now officially worse than useless

Malik Nadal Hasan, the U.S. Army major who massacred thirteen people and injured more than forty others at Fort Hood in Texas last week, made numerous attempts to contact members of the terrorist group Al-Qaeda by e-mail...

...and the FBI and other U.S. government intelligence agencies knew all about it but did nothing! Their general consensus was that Hasan's activity wasn't important enough to investigate.

So let's ask the obvious question: WHAT THE #%@$-ING HELL GOOD IS THE DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY?!?

No way around it: the United States government effed-up heinously. Homeland Security failed! The mechanism put in place by George W. Bush, Congress, and continued by Barack Obama SCREWED THE POOCH!

There is no more justification for the existence of the Department of Homeland Security, if it couldn't prevent something like this while knowing fully well that Hasan was apparently trying to actively conspire with the same bastards that caused the 9/11 attacks to begin with.

Ask yourself this folks: if your own government can't keep us safe from an American soldier who was seeking to collaborate with this country's enemies when it knew Hasan was trying to do so, how CAN it keep us safe from anything?

Protect yourselves. Lord knows the government can't.

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We saw STAR WARS: IN CONCERT in Charlotte this past weekend!

The Force was with us on Saturday night! Along with lifelong friends Chad Austin and Eric Wilson, I got to see Star Wars: In Concert when it came to Charlotte.

Chad and I hooked up in Burlington, and then high-tailed it down I-85 to rendezvous with Eric at his impregnable fortress. We wasted a few hours at Concord Mills Mall (which according to Eric is now the most visited attraction in the entire state of North Carolina), got some grub to eat and then went back to the Wilson homestead real quick so I could "get dressed" for the show. Then we headed out for the evening.

Here's the Time-Warner Cable Arena in downtown Charlotte, where the concert took place...

And here I am in my Jedi attire for a night at the Coruscant Operahou... errr... Charlotte's biggest indoor venue...

I hadn't seen this many people in Star Wars garb since Star Wars Celebration III in 2005! Granted, most of 'em Saturday night were kiddies, but there was at least one other guy there in full Jedi uniform. My getup aroused plenty of oggling, as you'll soon see.

Inside the arena before the show we got to check out a bunch of props, costumes and other artifacts from the Star Wars movies. And I wish my sister could have come (she was off running a half-marathon elsewhere during the weekend) 'cuz Chik-Fil-A was one of the show's sponsors and they had a bunch of their famous cows walking around in Star Wars costumes! Here's Eric and I with "Obi-Wan Cow-nobi"...

Chik-Fil-A also had a cow as Princess Leia (complete with hair buns) and Darth Vader walking around.

This being a major Star Wars event, the 501st Legion was well represented. Several stormtroopers (in both standard and scout armor) stalked the promenade and posing for photos. Here's Chad getting "taken into custody" by the 501st...

And then, right as Eric and I were getting this photo of Chad, something very neat started happening: people began coming to me to get their photos taken with!

And it only got better once we got to this big backdrop of the Coruscant skyline set up for photos...

Offhand, I think I posed for about 15 or 20 pictures: with children and not a few adults!

We stuck around for awhile and during a break in the "photography session" and with ten minutes before showtime we headed on in to our seats. Here's Eric, Chad and me awaiting the start of the concert...

So, what is Star Wars: In Concert like?

It's a musical and multimedia celebration of George Lucas's beloved film saga. Conducted by Belgian composer Dirk Brosse and narrated by Anthony Daniels (who portrayed C-3PO in each of the Star Wars films) and specially pre-recorded voiceovers by James Earl Jones, Star Wars: In Concert conveys the entire mythic arc of the Skywalker family - and particularly Anakin Skywalker's rise, fall and redemption - through the medium of John Williams' amazing score, accompanied by select scenes from the movies playing out on a gigantic screen behind the orchestra.

In fitting Star Wars fashion, the concert began with the THX brand's theme blaring out of the speakers ("the audience IS listening" y'all) followed by the 20th Century Fox fanfare as the arena darkened. And then the Star Wars logo burst onto the screen as the orchestra began to play as a montage of clips from the movies reeled away.

Anthony Daniels took to the stage, introduced Dirk Brosse and began his narrative of the story: how the Republic had stood for thousands of years but that a darkness was growing. And so began "Duel of the Fates". I have enjoyed this piece three times now in live performance. This was probably the best one I've heard yet.

The story then shifted to the events on Tatooine circa 33 years before the Battle of Yavin, where a nine-year old slave boy named Anakin Skywalker was dreaming of freedom and adventure. "Anakin's Theme", "Moisture Farm" and "The Flag Parade" were the next pieces of the set, showing us everything from young Anakin's home life (including his building C-3PO) on through the Boonta Eve podrace.

And then came "Across the Stars". I had been waiting since 2002 to hear this performed live. This has become one of my all-time favorite pieces of Star Wars music and the orchestra did not disappoint! Anakin and Padme's growing love for each other even as the galaxy teeters on the brink of war had never sounded so beautiful.

I have to say something here: Star Wars: In Concert engenders a whole new appreciation for George Lucas's movies. In two hours' time we saw the story of six full-length features presented as a single cohesive and compelling story. Call me crazy for saying this if you wish, but Star Wars: In Concert reinforced something that I have believed for years: that in decades still to come, the Star Wars saga will be held up as classical opera on the same level as Wagner's Ring cycle or Parsifal.

(Something else too: for the first time since all of the movies have been released, at last I see it as one story of equal parts, instead of thinking that Episode I is the weakest and The Empire Strikes Back the best installment of the series. Star Wars: In Concert... did something for me as a fan, that I'm still trying to articulate.)

Daniels continued with his narration: about how Anakin's lust for power to save the ones that he loved ultimately and ironically led him toward the Dark Side. Palpatine completes the young Jedi's seduction even as he finishes the master stroke of his takeover of the galaxy. So it is that an Empire is born and with it, Darth Vader. "Battle of the Heroes" - another of my very favorite Star Wars pieces - began, and was then followed by "The Imperial March".

Following a twenty minute intermission the concert began again. "The Asteroid Field" and "Princess Leia's Theme" were next. Then it was the haunting and reflective "Tales of a Jedi Knight", which quickly segued into "Cantina Band".

The diminutive green Jedi Master was the next to receive musical attention as the orchestra played "Yoda's Theme", the screen showing us every aspect of Yoda's career: from his mentorship to his swordsmanship!

Next up, spaceborne combat erupted to the strains of "TIE Fighter Attack". And then it was "Luke and Leia", as the relationship between the brother and sister was chronicled from birth on through their first meeting on the Death Star and then the revelation that Luke and Leia were the offspring of the very man they had been leading a war against.

If you love Ewoks (and who doesn't? Okay, forget I asked that...) then you'll thrill to hearing "Forest Battle" performed live. We certainly did!

Winding down the mythic narration, Daniels spoke of how Anakin Skywalker finally threw off the chains of hate and rage that had bound him to Darth Sidious for so very long, and through love for his only son found redemption at the cost of his own life. The orchestra performed "Light of the Force". And wrapping up the main show, they played "Throne Room/End Titles" for the finale.

But what is a magnificent concert such as this without an encore? "I get the feeling that you don't want to go home yet!" Anthony Daniels told the crowd. "Yeah!!" everyone screamed. The lights went down again and the orchestra did another performance of "The Imperial March".

And then the show was over. The credits rolled on the screen, while David Bowie's song "Ground Control to Major Tom" played over the speakers. How geeky cool is that? :-)

It was a heckuva grand evening: probably one of the best that I've had in awhile. Getting to share it with two good friends, and being able to entertain quite a few folks with my Jedi getup, made it even more special.

Star Wars: In Concert is touring the United States and Canada right now and is scheduled to begin a worldwide tour later on. I absolutely recommend going to this if it's at all possible. And I would love to see a DVD of this concert be made available at some point. PBS has been running a special about it lately, so I know they've already done filming for it. This is the kind of experience that more than deserves preserving for the ages.

But don't let that possibility deter you from seeing it now if you can, folks. Star Wars: In Concert is a performance you will remember for all time!

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Johnny Robertson DOESN'T know the Bible... again!

I must confess: it's entered my mind that the more local cult leader Johnny Robertson harasses others and tries to destroy lives and congregations, the more opportunity he's providing for others to seriously present what the Bible really says about Christ and salvation because of His grace.

There was much to observe from last night's What Does the Bible Say? on WGSR. For openers, Robertson validated something that I noted about him last week: that he not only insists upon baptism for the wrong reasons and damns those who don't subscribe to his belief, but that Robertson also think he controls baptism! It came when a woman called and asked to be baptized and Robertson expressed great hesitancy about it because Robertson suggested that the woman didn't "understand" why she wanted baptism. He claimed to take her phone number so that he could call her later, so that she wouldn't "die in" her sins... because Robertson demands that salvation is in the water and not in the Blood.

Kinda makes you wonder if Robertson and his cult actually worship H20, as much as they talk about it more than they ever talk about Jesus Christ.

Other things from last night's show, in no particular order...

- Robertson once again condemned dancing as sin, without any scriptural basis for it (other than a bizarre use of the story about John the Baptist and Herod).

- Robertson likened himself to John the Baptist and Malcolm X (?!?!?).

- Robertson continued to vent his unwholesome jealousy and hatred toward Martinsville-based television station BTW.

But it was Robertson's long tirade against Jonathan Falwell and comedian Steve Harvey that raised my eyebrows the most, and convinced me anew that for all his boasting, Johnny Robertson does NOT understand the Bible at all.

Robertson ran a clip of Harvey on some Christian talk show, talking about his born-again experience. And Steve Harvey was very up-front about his shortcomings in life, like being a divorced man. Some of the things he discussed in the clip elicited hearty laughter from the audience.

The gist of what Steve Harvey and Jonathan Falwell were saying is that God accepts us just as we are. But that's not good enough for Johnny Robertson. During last night's show Robertson declared and insisted many times that we can't "come as we are" before Christ. We have to be "good enough" for God before He can accept us, Robertson said.

Really?

Because I have read the New Testament, and if there's one thing that it says more than anything else it is that we can't merit salvation by any work we attempt on our own behalf. That the only thing that saves us is the finished work of Christ on the cross. And that to try to "add on" to that work - as Robertson and his cult insist - is to not have salvation at all!

So Mr. Robertson, God doesn't want us to come just as we are?

Well, Jesus Himself repudiates that notion in the parable of the wedding guest, as is recorded in Matthew 22, verses 2 through 14 (from the New International Version):

"The kingdom of heaven is like a king who prepared a wedding banquet for his son. He sent his servants to those who had been invited to the banquet to tell them to come, but they refused to come.

"Then he sent some more servants and said, 'Tell those who have been invited that I have prepared my dinner: My oxen and fattened cattle have been butchered, and everything is ready. Come to the wedding banquet.'

"But they paid no attention and went off—one to his field, another to his business. The rest seized his servants, mistreated them and killed them. The king was enraged. He sent his army and destroyed those murderers and burned their city.

"Then he said to his servants, 'The wedding banquet is ready, but those I invited did not deserve to come. Go to the street corners and invite to the banquet anyone you find.' So the servants went out into the streets and gathered all the people they could find, both good and bad, and the wedding hall was filled with guests.

"But when the king came in to see the guests, he noticed a man there who was not wearing wedding clothes. 'Friend,' he asked, 'how did you get in here without wedding clothes?' The man was speechless.

"Then the king told the attendants, 'Tie him hand and foot, and throw him outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.'

"For many are invited, but few are chosen."

A somewhat bizarre tale rife with hyperbole... but typical of Jesus and nobody before or since has ever mastered such metanoia-inducing metaphor.

Most of the parable is easy enough to understand. Then we get to the king's second invitation: he dispatches his servants to invite everybody that they can find, "both good and bad", to come and enjoy the wedding banquet.

How much more clearer than this must it be: that God does accept us wherever we are or however we are?

But then we arrive at the part about the guest who was "not wearing wedding clothes" and the king assails him for his lack of proper garment. And were Johnny Robertson or some of his followers to feign earnest discussion of this passage, they would no doubt interpret that it means we must be rightly "clothed" of our own accord in order to approach God. And they would not possibly be more spectacularly wrong in such insistence!

Because it was the custom in those days, in that part of the world, that the wealthy would not only provide food at a wedding banquet but also special clothes - usually some kind of robe - to each of his guests to wear for the occasion. Such attire masked social status or personal standing. At the banquet for the king's son, all were equal regardless of earthly position.

And then there is that one "guest" who just had to be different. We aren't told if beyond the palace walls he were rich or poor. I tend to believe that he was of considerable wealth and affluence. Why do I think that? Because a poorer person in those days would no doubt be thrilled to receive some new clothes for free and from the king... just for attending a banquet!

But not this one guy. He came alright. But he thought that he was too good than to accept the king's favor. That was for people who were "beneath" him. He trusted in his own righteousness to justify his presence at the banquet. This "guest" thought that he could get away with his own works and reject the complete and unconditional grace of the king. All he had to do was accept it "just as" he was.

No wonder the king became so furious! He had provided a sumptuous feast and wonderful new clothes for every guest, so that his son's wedding would be celebrated. This alleged "guest" tried to steal the spotlight by showing himself off.

Now, who does that sound like?

No doubt that many of you are expecting me to automatically ascribe Johnny Robertson as being like this miscreant wedding guest. But honestly, this could be anyone. And each of us would be cast out from the sight of the King for trusting in our own efforts more than trusting in His grace and provenance. It just happens that for sake of this discussion, Johnny Robertson and his followers clothe themselves with the name "Church of Christ" and boast that this alone will get them into Heaven to the exclusion of all others.

To the credit of the guest in the parable, at least he apparently didn't try to throw anyone else out of the party because he might have sneered at them.

Johnny Robertson can't even claim that much for himself.

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The Berlin Wall came tumbling down twenty years ago today

It was built by the East German government in 1961.

It completely encircled what was then West Berlin.

It was one of the most tangible symbols of the Cold War.

It was declared by communists throughout the world that the wall would last forever.

I know of no better additional commentary that can possibly be made besides this picture of the chunk of the Berlin Wall that I have owned since 1993...

Read more about the Berlin Wall on Wikipedia.

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Adult cells can be "reset" to form stem cells

Stem cells hold great promise for medical research, but their use are very controversial because of their primary source: cell lines cultivated from fetal tissue.

But now there may be another route opening up. Researchers have discovered a method for "reprogramming" adult differentiated cells into a condition very much like stem cells. The team, working at Whitehead Institute for Biomedical Research in Cambridge, Massachusetts and led by Rudolf Jaenisch, detail in the journal Nature how they achieved induced pluripotent stem (iPS) cells...

In the first in a series of experiments, the researchers grew individual immune cells, switched on their reprogramming genes and allowed them to continue growing and dividing. The team monitored how quickly the cells divided, and at what stage they began to produce a chemical signal that indicated they had become iPS cells. From time to time, the authors also checked some of the cells to make sure they really were pluripotent — for example, checking whether they could form teratomas, a type of tumour made up of many different kinds of cell.

Some of the cell populations began to signal after just two weeks. Others took longer — up to 18 weeks — but only 8% of the populations failed to generate iPS cells by this time. "Essentially, all cells have the potential to become pluripotent," Jaenisch says.

That's a huge milestone that has been reached, folks. And one that should please just about everybody. I ain't been too keen on a lot of stem cell-based research either, on grounds of where most of the material has been coming from.

Based on these findings, there could be some incredible medicine heading our way.

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"Health care reform" bill passes in House, BUT...

...it MIGHT not have enough votes to pass in the Senate.

All the same, it wouldn't surprise me in the least if it wound up clearing through there as well. And I have never been more supremely disappointed in the House of Representatives than this past weekend for passing this.

These are supposed to be men and women of sound mind, great wisdom and far-reaching vision. With very little exception, they are short-sighted and sold out on principle utterly.

Leadership entails having the resolve to say "no" to your own goals and appetites when the world tempts you to say "yes". As it is, there is damned little leadership in American government... and it's an open question as to whether we have any leadership at all, or have in quite a long time.

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Keeping an eye on Hurricane Ida

Hurricanes are horribly fascinating in my mind (maybe too fascinating, as anyone who followed this blog prior to and following Katrina will probably attest). They're right up there with tornadoes and freak blizzards on my list of favorite meteorological events. And even though each of those things devastates property and can rack up a priceless loss in human life, hurricanes are a whole 'nother thing psychologically.

I can't put it any other way than this: To be in the path of an oncoming hurricane is like looking down the barrel of God's shotgun.

So this late in the 2009 hurricane season, the states around the Gulf of Mexico are bracing to get hit by Ida sometime tomorrow...

Hopefully the Gulf waters will have cooled off this time of year and take a lot of the strength out of it before Ida makes landfall.

On another note, the current track looks to bring some still much-needed rain to this part of North Carolina later in the week.

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Cellphones adapted into microscopes (Is there an app for that?)

Using software he developed and about $10 of standard off-the-shelf parts, a solid-thinkin' dude named Aydogan Ozcan has converted camera-equipped cellphones into rather powerful microscopes.

When set up with the package, a cellphone like the Samsung model in the photo can image blood cells and bacteria. The phones can then send the data over a wireless network or be connected via USB to laptop computers. The potential for such devices are vast, considering that a doctor equipped with such a cellphone could diagnose malaria or other illnesses in very remote locations. What's particularly interesting from a technical perspective is that Ozcan's 'scope does NOT use lenses for magnification at all! It achieves microscopy by using the phone's camera to measure the scattering/interference pattern from light-emitting diodes shining on the sample. In other words, the package creates a magnified hologram of the sample being studied.

Very, very cool. Aydogan Ozcan has already started a company to further develop and market his work. No doubt it will be successful.

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Comic books found to increase childhood literacy

Comic books and graphic novels - once derided by "experts" as being the bane of adolescence and moral society in general - are now receiving praise for encouraging a love of reading while also greatly increasing the range of vocabulary in children.

According to a new study published in the journal School Library Monthly, comic books are just another form of literature that demands the same amount of reading comprehension as traditional novels or any other written material. Professor Carol Tilley of the University of Illinois notes that...

"Although they've long embraced picture books as appropriate children's literature, many adults – even teachers and librarians who willingly add comics to their collections – are too quick to dismiss the suitability of comics as texts for young readers. Any book can be good and any book can be bad, to some extent. It's up to the reader's personality and intellect. As a whole, comics are just another medium, another genre. If reading is to lead to any meaningful knowledge or comprehension, readers must approach a text with an understanding of the relevant social, linguistic and cultural conventions. And if you really consider how the pictures and words work together to tell a story, you can make the case that comics are just as complex as any other kind of literature."

I've written here before about how I grew up reading Marvel Comics' G.I. Joe. And there's no doubt that my own vocabulary was greatly enriched by reading that and other comic books (I should credit Larry Hama for being one of my favorite writers!) as well as starting off my interest in modern world history at an early age.

When you consider that much of written literature is description and exposition, adapting it into a visually-driven story that retains the depth of dialogue does make a lot of sense. And I've of the mind that it makes for much more compelling absorption than watching a movie version of the same material. Marvel's current adaptation of Stephen King's The Stand, f'rinstance. While I'll always be fond of the 1994 television miniseries, the comic version is vastly superior in so many ways. If it had been around when I first read The Stand, I'd likely be that much more enticed to read the original novel afterward.

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Nancy Pelosi attempting to bring back debtors prisons!

Well, when the Speaker of the House is pushing "health care reform" that obligates people to purchase $15,000 of medical insurance or GO TO JAIL FOR FIVE YEARS, what the hell else are we supposed to call it?

Click here to read the report from Representative Dave Camp of the House Ways and Means Committee.

The House vote on this... thing... may come as early as today.

If this succeeds where everything else has not in honking off the citizenry into outraged action, I've got plenty of rope. And I can get a good deal on feathers too.

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If you haven't stopped by Sci-Fi Genre in Durham lately...

...then you really oughtta should check them out anew. I first wrote about this place a few months ago. Well, they're at the same location - 3215 Old Chapel Hill Road in Durham, North Carolina - but since then the store has expanded in size! There's now about twice the space as before, all of it devoted to more games, comic books, action figures and other collectibles. There's also a massive game room to meet and greet your fellow players in.

But don't take my word for how awesome a place Sci-Fi Genre is. Look who else thinks so too:

Yup, Robin Williams himself, who word on the street has it is not only an avid Warhammer 40,000 player but that he also collects and plays a wicked kewl Eldar army! Maybe someday he'll show up again and I can play him with my Orks (and I've heard Will Smith and Billy Crystal are also into Warhammer 40,000: maybe Sci-Fi Genre could host a celebrity tournament or something...)

Their website is at scifigenre.com. Tell 'em you heard about 'em on The Knight Shift!

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Alliterative observation

The prostitution of persona in the pursuit of power is the perishing of progress.

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A prayer from the heart

Dear Lord,

I know that it rains on the just and the unjust alike.

I'm trying hard not to doubt Your will, and Your timing.

Lord, all I'm asking is that You please let it fall not so hard for awhile on really good people who are going through a very hard time right now.

(And for all of you reading this blog, I'd really appreciate it if y'all would keep the McCollum and Webster families in your thoughts and prayers.)

The peace of Christ surpasses all understanding. Let it come now to they who need it most.

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Because there aren't enough movies based on board games getting made lately...

Sony Pictures has now bought up the rights to develop Parker Brothers' classic strategy game Risk into a feature film.

Read all about it here.

Unlike other properties like Monopoly (being adapted by Ridley Scott) and Candyland and Battleship, I can envision Risk being a kick-butt motion picture. It'll basically be World War III.

And every country on Earth fighting to control Australia, 'course...

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It's 5 o'clock in the morning

So what is your intrepid blogger doing at this wee hour?

Already working on a long-term project... while the TV is tuned to Encore.

And what's playing? Stanley Kubrick's A Clockwork Orange.

This is gonna be one screwed-up day, I can tell already.

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Off-year post-election ponderance

Reflecting on something that I wrote the other day, in light of yesterday's elections in a number of places...

I can understand being happy that an individual candidate has won election.

I cannot understand being happy about a political party winning several elections.

Maybe it's just my cynical nature about such matters. Or that I've seen "control" flip back and forth between the Democrats and Republicans for many years now and there being no discernible difference between their respective collective performances.

What to call that? Enlightened? Disaffected? World-weary? Or just plain sick and tired of what must be called either mass ignorance or mass apathy?

If it weren't for knowing too much about history, I would probably be proud to be an apathetic voter. As it is, I'm bound to no party. Loyal to none but God and my own conscience. Granted, that doesn't tend to shift the polls appreciably much in an election...

...but as Martin Luther said at Worms: "Here I stand, I can do no other."

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Johnny Robertson: "God" by any other name...

Hasn't been much to report about local cult leader Johnny Robertson lately. In recent weeks he's been obsessed with attacking BTW, a competitor television station to WGSR in the Martinsville, Virginia market. Among other things Robertson has been blasting them for promoting shag dancing and "R-rated movies".

(I for one would like to know where in the Bible does Robertson find a proscription against R-rated movies. 'Tis a silly thing to fixate upon and it only demonstrates that Robertson is completely ignorant of the movie rating system to begin with, and why it was first implemented.)

Anyhoo, a few things about Robertson and his cult have crossed my virtual desk that I've been following up on. Nothing I can tip my hand to at the moment though. However, tonight I did receive the following observation in an e-mail. It's a very brilliant point, and one that I had not considered before.

Here's what another citizen of these parts has to say about the so-called "Church of Christ"...

"Johnny Robertson and his followers say that anyone not baptized into their Church Of Christ is damned to hell, and that means that Johnny Robertson has taken it upon himself to decide who gets into Heaven and who doesn't. If Johnny refuses to baptize someone because he hates that person then Johnny has made himself God."

Whoa whoa whoa now... That is absolutely true!

Let's break this down logically: Johnny Robertson declares that everyone not a part of his own twisted brand of "Church of Christ" is going to Hell. To be in the "Church of Christ" you must be water baptized. Water baptism is a requirement to get into Heaven, according to Johnny Robertson. And said water baptism is only performed by a "Church of Christ" minister.

That means that in the entire Reidsville/Martinsville/Danville area that there are only THREE OR FOUR individuals who are given the authority to baptize a person so that one can join the "Church of Christ" and get into Heaven! And everyone around here knows that Johnny Robertson controls the "Church of Christ" like a dictator.

So it only follows then that Robertson will control baptism like everything else in his cult.

So let's take lil' ol' me for sake of argument. Yours Truly has been called "devilish", "hellish", "the Antichrist", and many other things by Johnny Robertson. I also have it on strong authority that Robertson has prayed for my death and that he has said "I'm happy" about me "going to Hell" when I die.

I'll wager an RC Cola and a Moon Pie that I'm not on Johnny Robertson's list of "must baptize".

(Incidentally, my baptism was a little over ten years ago and was a very joyful and happy event. Robertson once told me that his own baptism was "miserable" and "wretched". What kind of person could possibly want to be baptized and have it remembered as a tragic event? I still can't figure that one out...)

Several witnesses have reported that Johnny Robertson has declared himself to be "God", even to his congregation in the Martinsville Church of Christ. If he actually believes that he has been empowered to decide who will be saved and who will not on the basis of his control of a temporal act, then I supposed in his dark and demented mind Robertson does believe he is God.

Sorta makes Johnny Robertson the Nazi-ish kommandant of a spiritual concentration camp, when you think about it...

(Would that make Charles Roark the equivalent to Joseph Goebbels? Probably.)

Thankfully however, not my salvation or anyone else's for that matter is in the hands of any other person on this earth. Thirteen years ago yesterday I found life abundant and free in Christ. A life that is not bound and shackled to legalism and "obeying the rules". I follow Christ because I want to, not because I have to.

And that is the life that awaits any one of us, at any time, and without having to first merit the approval of men who are just as fallen and in need of God's mercy as everyone else!

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ABC's revamp of V premiered tonight

Giant alien spacecraft arrive over dozens of major cities around the world and their leader - a sexy brunette in a revealing skirt and high heels - broadcasts a greeting in perfect English and all these other languages in 100,800,000 progressive high-def television, says her name is "Anna" and that humanity is the first sentient life they have ever encountered... and nobody on Earth is bothering to ask HOW the hell any of this is possible?!

Well, other than that...

(I'll interject that all of those previous plotholes were quickly forgotten just before the final commercial break, when Elizabeth Mitchell's character peeled back the skin and I screamed out "OH HELL YES!!")

I watched the premiere episode of V tonight on ABC and thought it was wildly and surprisingly good. I loved the original V miniseries from 1983, thought the following year's V: The Final Battle stank on ice and that the regular series that ran for one season was science fiction with an identity crisis: "Dallas in outer space" was nobody's idea of fun.

So what did we get tonight? A deftly produced update that sharply refocuses on Kenneth Johnson's original concept... which is what a lot of people wanted to see more of following the original miniseries to begin with.

Specifics? The first half was a tad bit slow, but everything ramped up like crazy in the folowing thirty minutes. In one hour we got just about all of the major elements of the classic V mythology: the Visitors, their real nature, their propaganda and how humans buy into it, the resistance, the "traitors"... all of it smartly overhauled and made meaner for a modern audience that after Lost and Battlestar Galactica is demanding more. I think V stands a good chance at delivering.

Other things: I thought Scott Wolf's character of Chad the journalist made for a far more convincing example of "situational ethics" than did the thing between the Visitors and Christine Walsh in the original. Looking back, Walsh caved way too early. Chad is a reporter who is all too aware of his career and his professional morals... and that cries out pending conflict. Elizabeth Mitchell, who has become one of my favorite players on Lost, is a treat here too: maybe a bit shallow in this initial act, but I thought the same of her Juliet character from Lost at first too, so I'm thinking she'll continue to impress as time goes on. My favorite character of the new V so far though has to be that Catholic priest played by Joel Gretsch: the sermon he gives about how trust has to be earned, not given away freely... that was a dimension that I never saw in V's original incarnation.

Overall, I thought that this promises to use extraordinarily inhuman catalysts to explore some very human conditions. So long as it remains true to character and doesn't spin out of control into a special-effects schlockfest (and keeping the rodent digestion to a minimum) I think ABC's V could develop into an exceptionally fine series.

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Anvil shooting: Firing anvils 200 feet into the air

Being into knifemaking I'd read about this before: how back in the old days blacksmiths would have "anvil shootings". There are conflicting stories about why the practice originated. Some say that it began when Union soldiers invading the South during the Civil War would try to destroy every anvil they found so as to break the Confederacy's ability to make weapons and other tools. Others hold, with some evidence backing them up, that there was a much more mundane purpose behind anvil shooting: that blacksmiths simply found it the quickest way to "clean up" an anvil after long periods of use.

However it started, there's no doubt that it was spectacular enough of a sight that for many years it became a favorite way to celebrate festive events throughout America, such as victory in war. But then with the increase of modern industry, anvil shooting began to decline.

And today, Gay Wilkinson and a number of others are bringing it back. Wilkinson is a world champion in the "sport" of anvil shooting. Points are added for each foot into the air the anvil is fired, and deducted for however many feet from the base it lands.

What does it look like? Here's Wilkinson preparing and firing his anvil...

HOLY COW!!!

That's about 200 feet straight up into the air that he shot that thing!

A good anvil costs anywhere between $150 and $300. I'd love to try this sometime, but the anvil we work with was made from scratch by Dad and is firmly welded to its supporting base (which has several feet of itself buried in the ground beneath the shop for extra stability).

That's probably a good thing :-P

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Birth of an ocean

It's long been speculated that the Great Rift Valley in Africa will someday split entirely and create a new ocean, but now we have hard scientific evidence that it's not just theoretical... it is happening now! In 2005 a massive, 35-mile long new rift opened up in Ethiopia (part of it pictured at top). According to a new study published in Geophysical Research Letters, it's been confirmed that the same process that happens on the ocean floors of the Atlantic and elsewhere (think Mid-Atlantic Ridge) is taking place in eastern Africa. Someday that rift that you see in the photo will split apart completely and become a whole new ocean!

So consider buying up beachfront property now. It'll be worth a lot of money... in a few million years or so.

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Come strolling with Ashley on McHale's Random Walks!

Ashley McHale, who is like the most smartest-est person that I have ever met, has just launched her blog! McHale's Random Walks promises to be "A collection of thoughts, usually math-themed, that are or are not my own". But folks seriously: I've known Ashley for a way long time and she is no doubt going to be sharing some tremendously deep wisdom and insight that God has blessed her with, in addition to all that mathematical stuff she does... which makes my head spin (no easy feat that).

Anyhoo: welcome to the blogosphere (again) Ashley! :-)

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And this is why I don't proclaim myself Republican

Awright, a disclaimer is in order: at the present time I am still registered as a Republican. That came about two years ago during my flirtation with running for House of Representatives in my district ('cuz some people were suggesting I take a stab at it, and we all know how much of a sucker I am for that sort of thing given how my Board of Education campaign began). So as of this writing I'm a Republican on paper and haven't bothered to change that.

What can I say folks? When it comes to things that don't really matter, I'm lazy.

And because I've only always voted for the candidate, never the party. Not once have I filled in the little bubble to vote a straight-party ticket. Hell, I'm of the mind that straight-ticket voting should be forbidden: a voter should be forced to THINK about the people he or she is casting a ballot for. That right came at a high price. Too high to be too convenient.

If you've read this blog for very long, y'all know where I stand on a lot of issues. I think this government taxes too high and spends too much. Our elected officials have forgotten that they serve us, and that we don't serve them. If a major corporation fails because of its own mismanagement, that's not my problem. Socialism only ever worked in the Book of Acts and among the Smurfs. Education belongs to the states and the communities, not the federal government. America doesn't need to stick its nose in places where it doesn't belong... and we can't afford to do that anymore either. I despise hypocrisy, I despise fraud, and I despise lusting for power and excusing it in the name of God. The last serious President of the United States was Ronald Reagan and everyone since 1989 has been inept, corrupt, unbalanced or all three. Abortion is the greatest failure of a shortsighted nation. An armed society is a polite society and one with statistically less crime. We shouldn't be afraid to tap into our own energy resources. I didn't vote for McCain or Obama in the 2008 election and my reward for that is getting to sleep soundly at night. And there is absolutely no faith to be had in the political parties... and I mean any political party.

I suppose that for the most part, conventional wisdom would land me in the Republican camp, being it that my values might be described as more "conservative".

But do I spend any of my precious time and energy shilling for the GOP?

Hell no.

And based on what I've been seeing from the special election tomorrow for New York's 23rd Congressional District, that sentiment ain't likely to change anytime soon.

Perhaps you've heard of it. It's been making quite the rounds on the news networks and the Intertubes. Until this past weekend it had been a three-way race between Republican Dierdre K. Scozzafava, Democrat William L. Owens... and Conservative Party candidate Doug Hoffman.

Scozzafava, the "Republican" candidate, favors abortion "rights", supports "gay marriage" (it's not possible for such a thing to even exist... but that's an essay for another time), thought the "stimulus" was a great idea, and didn't even have to win a primary election to be on the ballot. The only reason Scozzafava is a candidate is because she was tapped to run by GOP party bosses in the proverbial "smoke-filled room".

Doug Hoffman, on the other hand, is more Republican than the Republican candidate. Except that Hoffman is not running as a Republican. He's running as a Conservative Party candidate.

And until this past weekend, that was more than enough to merit his good name getting smeared by the elites of the Republican Party.

For the past several weeks the National Republican Congressional Committee put out press release after press release supporting Scozzafava and blasting Hoffman. Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele - a man that I have no respect for whatsoever - vowed unflinching backing of Scozzafava. Many other Republicans also followed suit by circling their wagons around Scozzafava and firing cheap shots at Hoffman.

And then there's Newt Gingrich. The former Speaker of the House not only endorsed Scozzafava, he insinuated that Hoffman has no real knowledge of his own district and declared that Hoffman's supporters were little more than an enraged fad. All that mattered to Gingrich was to get a Republican elected, ya see.

Then, stuff started happening. People all across the country began paying attention to the New York 23rd District race. They began contributing more to Hoffman - the alleged "spoiler" candidate - than to either of his two opponents. Sarah Palin endorsed Hoffman. A lot of long-time grassroots Republicans started getting honked-off angry at their party's leadership.

And then this past Saturday Dierdre Scozzafava withdrew from the race. It's now a two-way battle between Democrat William Owens and Conservative Doug Hoffman.

So guess what happened next? All those Republican honchos who had vehemently stood up for Scozzafava had a conversion as profound as Paul's on the Damascus Road. The scales fell from their eyes, they recognized how blind they had been and declared they were now for Doug Hoffman!

Yah right.

Do they sincerely believe we're going to fall for that one?

Friends and neighbors, you and I know what really happened. Newt Gingrich, Michael Steele, and a lot of incumbent Republicans all over the place put their collective moistened finger in the air, felt which way the winds were blowing and decided that supporting Hoffman after all would be politically prudent.

Maybe so. But theirs are not actions of people of principle.

And that is why I do not count myself among the Republicans today. I can not be a Democrat because of that party's official stances on too many issues. But I can not be a Republican because of that party's lack of principle.

Now, you tell me which is the worse of the two.

As I see it from here, the Republican Party has a choice. It can give itself a good long enema and completely flush out the tired old blue-bloods and the elitists that have been running the show for more than twenty years, and allow some seriously fresh meat to take over. Or, it can keep with this foolish errand at preserving its brand name at the cost of ever-diminishing quality. It would mean an absolute repudiation of the neo-conservative and "bigger government" philosophies that have entered into the party during these many years, but doing so promises to yield a vibrant and robust party of principle for many years to come.

Or, it can hold steady to its present course, until the Republican Party goes the way of the Whigs and the Bull Moose.

As I noted earlier, any business that fails by its own lack of merit deserves to fail. Nobody should be asked to prop it up.

The same holds even more true for a political party.

The Republicans can re-define themselves, or fade away.

And as I see it on this end of things, the latter is the more probable. Perhaps even the more preferable.

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Think Switzerland is the world's most secretive place for banking?

According to the Tax Justice Network based out of Great Britain, the most secretive financial jurisdiction on Earth is actually... the state of Delaware.

Yeah, that Delaware: on the eastern seaboard of these United States! $2.6 trillion was deposited in this country by non-resident citizens and corporations in 2007, with Delaware leading the way...

The survey of laws, practices and size of inflows in 60 jurisdictions found Delaware coming in first, followed by Luxembourg and then Switzerland. The Cayman Islands and the United Kingdom round out the top five.

"While the U.S. has been jumping up and down and saying 'Aha, bad, wicked Swiss banks,' the U.S. is doing exactly the same things as far as non-resident bank account holders," said Sarah Lewis, executive director of the group, based in the U.K.

Switzerland has been the poster child for financial secrecy over the past year. The United State sued Swiss global banking giant UBS AG, which paid a $780 million fine to settle a lawsuit against it by the government. As part of the deal, UBS admitted it actively helped Americans evade U.S. taxes.

The ranking is based on a composite of total offshore activity and measures such as whether a jurisdiction obtains beneficial ownership information about companies and the degree of cooperation in turning over requested financial information.

Delaware is attractive because it does not tax profits realized outside the state and does not require companies to be physically present, according to the Tax Justice Network.

So if I ever win the lottery or write a best-selling novel, I'll know now that I don't need to fly to Europe or the Bahamas to stash my money: I can just drive a few hours north and put it in Delaware :-)

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Review of THE ESSENTIAL "WEIRD AL" YANKOVIC

For more than thirty years (I'm counting his earliest submissions to The Dr. Demento Show too) "Weird Al" Yankovic has influenced culture just as much as he's parodied it. Sometime next year will come his thirteenth studio album. And while we're waiting for it, I have to recommend that you run out and buy (but don't illegally download, you hooligan!) The Essential "Weird Al" Yankovic: a fantabulous two-disc set of 38 songs, all terrifically remastered, spanning Al's professional career.

It came out this past week and on Saturday night I bought my copy (on Halloween incidentally, so I was wearing my Jedi Knight costume when I went into the store... which was all the more appropriate since "Yoda" and "The Saga Begins" are both on the album :-). I spent most of yesterday listening to this two and a half hour treasury of Weird Al goodness. Like, three or four times, I think...

The Essential "Weird Al" Yankovic is a musical odyssey not just of Al's career, but even of modern civilization... after humorous fashion. This is no mere compilation album, though each song is certainly a classic. But The Essential "Weird Al" Yankovic must be appreciated as a monumental work in its own right. This set is absolutely a serious study in the beginning and development of a true musical artist. And not just Al either: his entire band - Jon "Bermuda" Schwartz, Steve Jay, Jim West and Rubén Valtierra - gets spotlighted for their talent in the liner notes. These guys have been wildly successful for three full decades and are now primed to enter their fourth with no end in sight. How does that happen? Listening to The Essential "Weird Al" Yankovic, the lesson is clear for any who endeavor to succeed: do what makes you happy, but don't be afraid to grow and change.

Because that is a virtue that I doubt will go without respect upon listening to this album. Playing it all the way from "Another One Rides the Bus" (Al's 1980 debut on the charts) on through "Trapped in the Drive-Thru" (the parody of R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet", from 2006's Straight Outta Lynwood) one can't help but hear the maturing of Al as both singer and songwriter. It's a quality that, I hate to say, isn't embraced as fully as it should be by too many in the arts and entertainment industry. I'm not going to "name any names" here, but I will comment that in my long-considered opinion it's much of the reason why "Weird Al" Yankovic's career has never waned, and indeed has only continued to find new fans even while maintaining the many faithful that he has already accumulated across thirty years and more.

As I said, there are 38 songs filling up two discs of The Essential "Weird Al" Yankovic, including the extra gory version of "The Night Santa Went Crazy" and "Albuquerque" (Al's longest song to date, running more than 11 minutes). The set is about evenly split between Al's parodies and his originals, among which number some of his finest and funniest works, such as "Dare to be Stupid", "Don't Download this Song" and (one of my all-time favorites) "Trigger Happy".

Of course, the songs likely to be played most often are going to be the parodies. And I'm happy to report that most of the classics are here and sounding better than ever! "Eat It" and "Fat" are naturally part of the album. You'll also be glad to know that "Like a Surgeon", "Smells Like Nirvana", "Amish Paradise", "White & Nerdy" made the cut, as did "Jurassic Park" (only Weird Al could have taken Richard Harris' "MacArthur Park" and turned it into a song about rampaging dinosaurs). The one song that's not in this compilation that I wish had been included was "Couch Potato": Al's spoof of Eminem's "Lose Yourself". But then again, Disc 2 was already crowded enough with "Albuquerque" and "Trapped in the Drive-Thru", so that's likely just a quibble about technical issues.

I'll wrap this up by saying thusly: that The Essential "Weird Al" Yankovic is a MUST-have album, whether you have just discovered Al's music or are a longtime fan. And, echoing the sentiments of the interior notes written by NPR Music's Stephen Thompson, this collection exemplifies why Weird Al more than deserves to be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame... along with finally getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

If you only buy one CD this year, make it The Essential "Weird Al" Yankovic. And if you only buy six CDs this year, buy six copies of it!

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Asimov estate authorizing trilogy of sequels to I, ROBOT

Isaac Asimov - perhaps the most prolific writer of the Twentieth Century and especially regarded for his contributions to science fiction - passed away in 1992. It's now being announced that Asimov's estate has given the official go-ahead for a trilogy of sequel novels to his acclaimed I, Robot series. The books will be written by Mickey Zucker Reichert, an author whose works have primarily been of the fantasy genre.

(With all due respect to Mrs. Reichert, I've no doubt that she is a fine writer but I also can't help but find this situation very ironic since apart from Tolkien and a few other writers that he respected, Asimov was famously known to have despised fantasy literature and on at least one occasion referred to it as "crap".)

Hmmm... I'm more "meh" about this news than I care to really dwell upon. If there's going to be any official pastiche of Asimov, I'd much more prefer that it be a fitting conclusion to the Foundation series, produced from any notes that Asimov might have left about whatever grand finale he was driving toward.

Not likely that will ever happen though. Maybe that's for the best...

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The world's TINIEST working model train set

Check out what David Smith of New Jersey has made: a scale model of a scale model train set (for his real model train set's layout). And the thing actually runs too!

Behold...

It's 35,200 times smaller than an actual train.

Now that is some practical nanotechnology! :-)

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Star Wars costumes of Halloweens past

Since last night I've been getting my Jedi Knight costume (yah the very one that I wore to the Board of Education meeting two years ago) ready for this evening. Mostly 'cuz I promised some friends that I'd come by and let their own younglings see it. And I thought it'd be fun to wear it around throughout the rest of the night so I've been ironing the kimono, brushing the cloak and polishing my lightsaber.

It's a fine costume. Movie quality at that! And staffers from Lucasfilm have told me that the lightsaber I made is like something they would have made for a real Star Wars film! Yes, I'm very proud to own some real Jedi threads :-)

But you know: we all have to start somewhere. Every journey has a first step. And it's true with being geeky enough of a Star Wars fan as to make a costume - or more than one - inspired by the saga. When I was a younger punk and going out trickster-treating on Halloween, I usually had one of those vinyl "costumes" with the cheap plastic mask. I was Darth Vader and Yoda and a Stormtrooper back in the day but...

...well, when you get older, and bigger, you realize that you deserve something a bit more "boss".

It took me longer than most would have expected, but in October of 1996 I made my very first "serious" Star Wars costume. It was for the Halloween party the Baptist Student Union at Elon was having at Blue Ribbon in Burlington. I'd been wondering all that month what I should wear. And then one day at Spencer's at Four Seasons Town Centre in Greensboro, just over a week before the party, I spotted a two-piece Darth Vader mask (the kind that Don Post Studios used to make).

"And that's when I went mad, Your Honor..."

It started with the mask. Then I decided that I had to have a black cape. And then a lightsaber. And gloves. And... well, you get the idea. I just couldn't stop until I had made myself as Darth Vader-ish as I possibly could. The chest-box, bits of armor and the boxes on the belt were all cannibalized from one piece of a child's Darth Vader costume that the manager at Halloween Express let me have for free (when I bought the cape). There was also a black vinyl cape that I cut holes for the arms and had that under the main cape and also over the armor and tucked in beneath the belt (so as to achieve that "multiple robes" look). I bought a black pair of jeans just for the occasion and thankfully the Darth Vader lightsaber toy had just hit the toy store shelves. Finishing it off, I used Dad's old black motorcycle boots.

Well, "Darth Vader" was a hit! I even wound up winning the "Best Costume" award at the BSU party. And for the rest of the evening I enjoyed strutting around Elon's campus as the Dark Lord of the Sith (something that would kinda be repeated a week before Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace came out, but that's a story for another time). The one thing that I wish could have been better, though no fault of my own, is that I'm admittedly not as tall as Darth Vader was in the movies! To really pull off a persuasive Vader, you need to be at least six feet tall. Most folks aren't anywhere near David Prowse's height and build. And some people who build extremely good Vader costumes wind up compensating by wearing way padded boots: almost like something you'd find in Gene Simmons' closet. I don't have that sort of stature, and I don't plan on ever making a Vader costume as awesome as some of the fan-made ones that I've seen...

...but on Halloween night 1996, none of that mattered. For one wonderful evening, I was Darth Vader, baby! :-)

So that was what I did with a week to work with. But come the following Halloween, I wanted to spend more effort on the matter. Baptist Student Union was having another Halloween get-together at Blue Ribbon. And emboldened by the previous year's costume, I got a bit daring.

There was no question what I had to do to top Darth Vader. For 1997 it had to be Boba Fett. Including the jetpack.

It took me over a month to build, but in the end I had my Boba Fett costume for Halloween 1997! The helmet is the classic replica that Don Post Studios created. I bought a light-blue jumpsuit from Sears and a gray t-shirt for the "vest". Most of the armor pieces were cut from sheets of aluminum that I bought at Lowe's, then shaped and spray-painted (and I painted Boba's various insignia by hand on them afterward). The codpiece, collar armor and knee armor were cut from placemats found in the kitchen section of Wal-Mart and likewise spray-painted. I bought ammo pouches from an Army surplus store in Greensboro and dyed them a dark enough shade of brown. The gauntlets were made from youth-sized soccer shinguards I found at K-Mart: I just took the hard plastic guards, and epoxied onto each a plastic disposable drinking cup that I cut down the side and added Velcro for easy wearing and removal. The bits on the gauntlets were salvaged from various toys and models (and the "flamethrower" hose is one that I found at my family's old farm). The boots were an old pair that I didn't wear anymore, so I spray-painted them and added cloth "spats" to hide the laces. Mom helped me with the cape.

And the jetpack? Cardboard, for the most part. The "rocket" on top of it was fashioned from three of those cone-shaped air fresheners that you can buy at any grocery store or Target or Wal-Mart. I used two of the bases from the fresheners (I'm telling y'all here and now, that the apartment "Weird" Ed and I had smelled glorious for over a month) to make the tops of the side "cylinders" on the pack. The nozzles were small plastic cups epoxied to balls I found in the sporting goods section of K-Mart, then spray-painted silver and attached to the sides of the pack. The whole thing attached with Velcro and a hidden piece of belt to a strip of armor (also made from placemat) that extended down the back from the collar armor.

Granted, it's possibly the cheapest Boba Fett costume ever assembled. I think the entire thing cost about $200 (and most of that was the price of the helmet). But it looked hella kewl! My friends in Baptist Student Union loved it, and the kids who came into the restaurant couldn't stop oggling it. Then the next day (which was the actual Halloween 1997) I put it on that afternoon and Ed and I walked all over Elon's campus and saw jaws dropping all over the place. The funniest moment came when we went into the student center where a group of prospective students and their parents were being given a tour: I did my best Boba Fett walk, came in, and nodded my helmet toward them. Ehhh... wonder how much enrollment money that lil' stunt cost Elon that day? :-P

Well, that first Boba Fett costume was a knockout! But someday I want to make a much better one: out of vacuu-formed plastic and whatnot. I've met Jeremy Bulloch before: he's the actor who portrayed Boba in The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi, and he and I are the exact same height! So a Boba Fett costume would be all-around sensible to have if I'm gonna dress up as a Star Wars villain.

But in the end, it really isn't how much money and material you can pour into a Star Wars costume, or any costume for that matter. It's the passion you have for a character or a story which really counts. People aren't gonna be impressed by a thousand-dollar getup as much as they are by seeing you having fun with the role and enjoying being something different or odd or both... if even for just one night.

Happy Halloween y'all! :-)

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House "health care" bill: Death panels and trial-lawyer protection

The guys at Flopping Aces have gone through the 1,990 page abomination that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has introduced as the House of Representatives(?) version of the health scare "reform" bill.

Yah you read that right: one thousand, nine hundred and ninety pages.

It's calculated to cost $1.28 trillion.

So what's in this... thing?

Abortion funding.

The so-called "death panels" that we have been told repeatedly were just a figment of some people's imagination.

And... get a load of this one:

"Pelsoi inserted a provision which would punish state governments who attempt any kind of law suit abuse reform that would impact lawyers fees."

What. The. Hell. ???

So it's not enough that Congress has decreed that pharmaceutical firms are to be protected from lawsuits stemming from any injury or death that even untested vaccines might cause. Now our "lawmakers" are shielding trial lawyers from tort reform... by way of "health care" legislation?!

Who the hell do these people think they are?

I know what they are not. They certainly do not qualify to be our "representatives". With the exception of possibly two or three people that I can readily think of that are in Washington today, the members of the House and Senate and the Obama White House are so detached from the reality outside the Beltway that they have no understanding or empathy at all with the American people. Pardon my French folks, but these idiots don't have a f#&@ing clue at all about the lives of the people they allege to be "serving".

Do you think Nancy Pelosi gives a flying rat's ass about you or me or anyone else? "Let's hear it for the power!" she cried out when she became Speaker of the House. And that's all that matters to these bastards.

We don't have a government of the people, by the people and for the people anymore, friends and neighbors. Sane people are incapable of even desiring to write up nearly two thousand pages of legislation that will take away personal liberty and put their children's grandchildren into hopeless hock.

So what kind of person is capable of such a thing?

Mull that one over in yer gray matter...

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Stimulus jobs are $160,000 each?!?

That's what Jake Tapper at ABC News has reckoned. Figuring that the Obama administration is boating of anywhere between 640,000 and 1 million jobs saved or created because of the "stimulus" package, and that $159 billion was allocated by Congress and President Obama for such purpose, then the most conservative estimate has each rescued job worth $160,000.

The White House economists are calling these figures "calculator abuse". Wish I'd have thought of that one during those many times that I struggled with algebra in eighth grade!

Pssst... hey, President Obama. Wanna really use the government to create jobs and bolster the economy? It's very very simple:

CUT TAXES
AND
CUT SPENDING!!!

NO country in history has ever spent itself into prosperity. America can not possibly be any different.

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